Habs 5, Leafs 4 (SO): What the fuck are you doing?!

See? There are enough crappy teams to chew on to stay at .500 for the year. But a combination of shitty defense and Jaro's small twitchy legs/crappy laterals, and this went to the most lumpsided shootout ever (in our favor, thankfully) when it should have been 4-2 in regulation.

I was supposed to be having dinner and a movie with the family tonight, but that failed. Instead we went to Cheaters to eat, and by the time we were done, we were found stuck in the deadzone of movie land. That, and none of us were really in the mood to go wait around and see a 9:45 movie. Cheaters had the game on though, with sound. Seriously guys? Did you play like crap yesterday because you were saving yourselves for tonight? Not that it was any better tonight...

It's a win, but I say MEH!
- I thought they buried Toskala under the Ricoh Center...
- Metro had the best goal of the year: Off Toskala's head.
- Jaro is made of rubber.
- If you win a faceoff, get the puck!
- Where the fuck is our powerplay? That 5-on-3 of failure on the worst PK in the League was a travesty.
- And the two powerlay goals last night were enough to make us worry. Tonight was just as worrisome...
- A stat you do not want to know: Ponikarovsky has more career points (25) against the Habs than any other team.
- Jaro! Squeeze in your fucking arms!
- Hammer's goal was hilarious: Gomez saw him standing by the net and just banked it off him. He didn't even know he scored. For once, being a pylon in the RIGHT end of the rink works!
- Ron Wilson's face goes from normal, to pink, to red as the game wears on.
- Yea, shootout. Toskala sucks, and Stempniak/Kaberle have no idea what they're doing out there. Thank goodness.
- Gomez and Cammy used the exact same move.
- My brother: We can score when no one is in our way.
- Next up is the Thrashers, again. Best start shooting, 'cause if it's Pavelec again...well, let's just say he made over 50 saves this afternoon against the Sens (who were also shooting like they had a disease) and he nearly shut them out...

And it starts again. Seriously guys? Habs fans are using this "win" to diss Price, who played lights out last night against an actual bonafied contender team. So far, Jaro proved he's an adequate goalie to take some games in, but when he's actually busy his problems are glaring (laterals suck, puck handling, rebounds and problems at stopping play because of his rebounds). Don't get me started on the flags that are raised when he's playing against a contender team...

Also would it really kill you to play the kid at home against the "crappy" teams for once instead of on the road, where he's practically the only one playing? I'm starting to wonder what the hell Martin is thinking. I mean, he plays Bergeron on the PK and OT and Guimauve in the final minutes... He's off his fucking rocker.

Habs 2, Hawks 3: Too many passengers

You'd expect after potty-mouth Martin ripped them a new one in practice and tried to bring in some energy to these guys that they'd come out flying eh? I don't know how much the flu has affected them, but it's worrisome. That or we'll just watch them destroy weak teams all year and then plotz against actual teams.

Luckily there's more of them than true contenders to balance around .500 eh?

However they just didn't take advantage of the Hawks weaknesses (pressure on the defence, Huet) while the Hawks did take advantage of the Habs (Bergeron's feet, Hal Gill's footspeed, pedestrian defence). And if they could have finished, Price would have had 5 assists tonight.

This is the sign Price erected at the blue line of his zone, warning all about his defence.

W00T/MEH
- I'm a closet Blackhawks fan. So sue me.
- After being screwed for like two weeks, Price gets thrown to the fire and is yet again the only one playing defence and some offense while playing goal. Did Huet face anything that he had to handle with difficulty on his own?
- Not the first person I'd think of when it comes to a headshot but Ladd totally elbowed Dagger there. Dag is out with a concussion apparently. I guess we'll see Stewie face the pugnacious Leafs.
- GOD FUCKING DAMMIT BERGERON IF YOU'RE STANDING STILL POINT YOUR FEET THE OTHER WAY! Yay, Versteeg scored! WTF WAS BERGERON DOING OUT THERE ON THE PENALTY KILL?!
- HABS SUCK AT FACEOFFS! So much so I need caps.
- Penalties make me sick...however we play better on the PK than on the PP.
- HMCS Hal Gill is wearing on my patience. It's gotten to the point where I think he really just isn't able to work with the system. And wtf was he doing on the wrong side on a key moment only to blow the blue line and take a penalty (which they scored on with a fucking LASER).
- Guimauve? Where are you? Oh there you are. Did you wait until the 3rd to remember you have a job to do?
- Andrei fell asleep on Kane for the pass to the game winner. Your brother would have destroyed him, especially since they're friends.
- Soupy with the fancy spin-o-rama...gets run over by Patches. What a truck!
- How many times did Cammy spin around and around by the net to find a lane? I counted 5 at least.
- I swear the the puck had sticky tape on it. Never saw so many missed opportunities because the player kept going while the puck didn't.
- Pleky was everywhere.
- Cammalovely scored!
- I asked for Travis Touchdown to do one of his backbreaking goals 'cause that's what it was going to take. He responded!
- Hawks logo is apparently a bullseye. Must be, as that's where everyone is aiming when they shot on net.
- So uh...could we maybe accidentally forget Guimauve and run off with Byfuglien or Versteeg?
- If Price doesn't play tomorrow, you've got a big problem Martin.

Habs 1, Crosby 3, Some other guys 3: Call Patrick Jane, we've found Red John

He is Maaaaaar...io?

Oooo suspense.

Don't know much about the credibility of the dying words of some douchebag dead in a bathtub...

SO ANYWAY, can we stop riding the "hot hand" and get back to a schedule here boss? Reason why I hate that is it puts the emphasis on the wrong syllable where such an emphasis is not needed. A mailed in Thrashers team, a tired (crappy) Islanders team, a sucky Lundqvist who randomly steals games, and the Islanders fully awake again... These were tools of practice. But you're not going to walk into Pittsburgh with a flu-ridden team and hope to win on the efforts of Kyle Chipchura alone. Though he did come close, just Guimauve is fucking useless...CALL UP RUSSELL OR WHITE! GIVE CHIPPER LINEMATES! I mean notice how a line of Chips/Patches/Dagger buzz? Yea, where is that? If anything we can only hope Gomez breathed on a few of them and left a parting gift.

BLARGH!
- I missed you Pricey!
- Check out the stickhandling. On his knees, after a tricky bouncy dump in that would have gone in if your name was Pavelec. Sees a Pen coming for him. So whilst off balanced and holding his stick high close the black he quickly flicks the puck to the glass and out of harm's way. Skills.
- Check out the other guy's stickhandling sending it right to a DoG penalty. Pleky scores! Merci MAF!
- Crosby tried to make his third a highlight reel but lost the puck in his feet. Showoff. Instead the third was a garbage goal that needed to be reviewed in case he kicked it in.
- Pleky vs Guerin? I laughed.
- Gionta looked a little drunk.
- Gorges was the only defenceman with a hit. You know you're sick when...?
- I guess Coach don't know to put Lapierre against Crosby. He's only been in his face all his life.
- Finally people realize Chipper isn't as slow as you think he is. And woo he's winning faceoffs now!
- That net knocking off penalty was total fucking bogus. And no goalie in the world would be able to stop that shot (unless it was just the two of them out there, but I digress).
- Jaro too small to cover corners. This is the sad fact :(
- Jaro almost pulled a Biron when he ran to the top of the circle to get to the puck first. My heart stopped.
- They really looked sick out there. Well most of them. Metro still looked ready to puke. Fanned on two shots in a row. I would have been happier if someone had thrown up.
- Since the game was out of reach I was hoping Moen would score a hat trick in 5 minutes. That or Price gets a goal, assist, and a fighting major. Gotta watch it when you touch a goalie's head and knock off their masks. They bite!
- RDS highlight of the night: they called McKee "McCabe". Ouch.
- To Chicago!

Habs 3, Islanders 2 (OT): Oh dramatics

It doesn't surprise me one bit that the Islanders brought this to OT. After all, they're one of the only teams in the NHL that chips away at 60 minutes until they can chip no more. Tonight's overtime hero was the Czech Connection of Hammer converting on the most amazing pass I've seen SuperPleky do: saucer pass over a sprawling defenceman and Bob's your uncle, game's over before I can watch Castle. Thank you Habs!

However, Coach, I'm not a fan of the "win you're in" thing. It's weak and annoying. And if Price plays Pittsburgh after getting the shaft when you tossed the schedule out the window, better hope he's not rusty. But good on Price: to avoid the media bugging him with stupid questions, he ditched his goalie gear after practice and went back out on the ice to have some solo fun with a net by shooting pucks. Martin should play him on the point. He was a defenceman when he was little...

Oh and Castle's Halloween episode, if it were supposed to be one, was awesome. Go Habs.

Team Mugging!

W00T!
- If you're angry about the blown call that even Streit thought was a high stick, the Islanders would have been tied anyway had the massive ref fail of the evening not rob them of a goal earlier with the quick whistle when Jaro juggled the puck and lost it to an Islanders' stick.
- Metro! Riddled with flu, pale as a ghost, looked like he was ready to vomit all game, left his heart on the ice and gave it his all. Slickest move from the sickest man around for the first goal to Spacek, who reminded me just how much he scared me when he was a Buffaslug. Looked like the Metro of old who was tearing up Sweden.
- Jaro had an up and down game. Defence had an up and down game. C'est la vie. I still close my eyes and pray when he wanders from the net and the defence takes their sweet time to collect a pass if/when he decides to make one.
- Gio vs Sutton was hilarious. Dude, you got knocked over by an Oompa Loompa.
- Gio is still my runner up for the C. Though I'd gladly hand it over to Cammy or Chipper.
- Chipper's line was awesome tonight. Yea, even you Guimauve.
- HMCS Treant was a bit slower than usual getting off the ice tonight. Inadvertently caused two too many mens penalties.
- As seen on Twitter: (@jamesaduncan) Halak: "Defense, you sold me short and they scored..." Defense: "We do that every now and again." Price: "Told you!"
- Pricey needs a hair cut. At least it's not as bad as Brendan Witt.
- RDS highlight of the night: They actually referred to the Ducks as "Les Canards D'Anaheim". I am still in shock over it.
- Is DiPietro still alive...? And how many more 1st overalls does it take to make a team...? Share!

Habs 5, Rags 4: A love letter to Mike Cammalleri

Oh Cammalleri, how do I love thee. Let me count the ways!
I love thee for every shift and shot and when you take flight
Even when the game is feeling out of sight
I love thy ability and finess,
Even though thou art smaller than Latendresse
I would gladly throw my hat
And pray to the holy ink of thoust contract
I love thee freely, as the strides thoust take;
I love thee purely, as the goalies thoust brake.
I love thee with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's ruse.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
By the Holy Forum Ghosts of the Sainte Flanelle,
I love thee with the breath, smiles, tears, of all my life!
And, thank Bob, five more years,
Five more years, I shall but love thee better.

Eh. Who said poems had to stay in a rhyme...

W00T!
- Yes, that's more like it. The fight, the no-quitting, the patience... Sloppy at times, but when things settle down and regain controle, we have the sense and feeling you guys can beat anyone.
- Higgy is having a tough time in New York but at least he wasn't booed! Fans booed Avery instead.
- Rangers have the Cop Line: Callahan, Dubinsky, Higgins. Too bad O'Sullivan is an Oiler.
- Gomez > Gaborik. That is all.
- Guimauve is always out of position giving Chipper a tougher time.
- The Bergeron Bomb would be a fourth liner if Carbo were coach. Thankfully Mara seems ready to compensate for his defensive liabilities.
- Barn burner! Sure it got sloppy towards the third, but it was a damn entertaining at least.
- Is it just me or does King Henrik always look shaky when he plays the Habs...? He looked very surprised on most of the shots, and with the exception of one game last season (the Markov-less one) seems to always give up at least 5 goals. Interesting!
- And those illegal shoulder pads don't help you either.
- Yup, my brother and I closed our eyes and prayed when Jaro went to play the puck. It's not really his strength...

Habs 5, Islanders 1: A New York warm up

Yes, the Islanders played to a tough shootout victory last night and they looked it. Habs played to a quiet shootout victory the night before that and had a good rest between and looked it. But what can you say. When in a slump, hope the Thrashers and Islanders come in to bring the suck. It worked.

Over the course of the past few games the shots against got lower and lower, which is great, because the forwards had the puck more and the defence was forcing everything wide. Tonight they added a new tool to the shed: goalie protection. Shots rarely got to Jaro tonight, and those that did were seen all the way. They also kept people from walking out in front too much (but when they did they were either neutralized or just shot wide from fatigue).

It's nice to see the defence be aware for once. No more kicking pucks in your own net by a stunned and annoyed goalie. Reason for this? Positioning. Movement. If you're standing still unaware at how your foot is angled towards the net, you will be burned. If you're running about overwhelmed you will plotz. And with Jaro's problematic rebounds, it's good to see the awareness of the defence when the puck actually came to him and bounced out to the slot that they would whack it out of harms way. The active stick, it works.

Yea it was another quiet night, and Jaro probably grabbed a beer.

But... "A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines. With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do." (Emerson). So yea, the Habs took the foot off the gas in the 3rd, and Jaro showed us just how much he sucks at playing the puck to break his own shutout bid while on the powerplay, and gave the Islanders a shmidgin of energy. Nothing like a good ol' error to remind us just how easy the tides can turn in a hockey game. Hey ya gotta keep it interesting, right?

That or I guess they really did have a beer in the room before coming out.

W00T!
- Sorry Biron, you're not Billy Smith.
- Uh huh... With two uneventful games for our goalie, it didn't take long for the Price bashers to come out and spew their bile. Funny how they were quiet when he was stealing games while making the 40 shot saves earlier. That goes double for the Gazette's Hickey...
- Cammy's PP goal using his Bret Hull knee shot! IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZER!
- Bergeron collected some gold and change tonight. He's still a little weird when he's being forechecked though.
- Chipper came to his aid when Jackson punched Bergeron while defending, only somehow ended up fighting Thompson.
- Tavares should learn those slick OHL moves really don't work in the NHL too well. But I'm happy he's not a Leaf or we'd never hear the end of it. They'd probably ruin him anyway.
- Streit stays out for the entire Islanders powerplay. No wonder his ice time is so high.
- Metro's back! Metro's back! And he's still awesome! And got the first star!
- Patches scored a la Kovy Spin from the slot.
- I never noticed that Dagger is kind of tall...
- If Gomez keeps scoring, his parents won't leave.
- Keep this type of play up when the Rags come in Saturday and then I'll be absolutely impressed.

You disabied me, you puppy

Picture taken in Hamilton's Outback as Bob Gainey holds a meeting with Awol Kostitsyn.

I'm out of musicals, Sergei. Only you can save yourself. But if Bob Gainey can take riverside walks to chat with Kovy and set him right, you're small fry. Now, pick up your stick, get on the plane, and keep playing with Maxwell. And seriously? You're ON the fucking top line! And Maxwell finally has someone to play with!

And if you'd stop the drama, you might have been called up soon. However, right now, you're not showing them any reason why they should call you up.

Come baaaack, Sergei!

V 2, A 1 (SO): Aliens, I'm sure of it

So now you guys decide to play defence? (Until you forgot in the 3rd period which was why Army scored, of all people). Though I don't know what's more disturbing: the fact the 4-1 T(h)rashers looked completely opposite from the team that made Brodeur look silly, or the fact the Habs could only really score one against such a muddy defensive coverage while keeping the thrashers to 12 shots for 40 minutes. I also find it disturbing that every open net ended up with a post, and that Jaro kept looking behind him even when the puck never got to him...

My only conclusion: V!

That's right. The Habs are really some strange group of reptilian aliens hiding under a human skin seeking control of our world by trying to integrate themselves into our society via our fascination with hockey. Check your pets!

Look out! Or not! The Habs can't shoot straight!

Meanwhile Jaro could have taken a lunch break for 40 minutes and the outcome would have probably stayed the same.

My theory of aliens having taken over the team would probably answer my questions on why the Energy Line isn't very energetic these days...save for Patches, who is playing with a separated shoulder yet actually manages to cause all forms of havoc. Though the effort is wasted after the zone is lost on the next line, and forced back to defend. Yay!

Apparently the T(h)rashers like to toss people badly into the boards. Good line brawl with Lapierre dropping Army (hiss) while Bergeron wobbled into the corner. And a clearly annoyed Gomez turning and attacking after he was sent head first into the boards.

I was not pleased with the powerplay that barely had any set up save for when Pleky was out there. Towards the end of the game though it just fizzled. I was pleased with the penalty kill though, that looked better than the powerplay. Keep that up, however... as Streit and John "Back Door" Tavares are coming in next.

So the Habs Aliens can only win in overtime this year apparently. I was not happy it went to a shootout, especially with Jaro in nets (who's method is "hope and pray they miss"). However we're lucky Kovalchuk appeared out of it (he was quiet the entire game actually, which usually indicates a loss for Atlanta...7 goals in 5 games, did nothing tonight except for one shot that was aimed right for the CH on Jaro) and shot wide, and Peverley just didn't know what he was doing on the shootout (Kozlov is their shootout guy, who was out for tossing Gomez head first into the boards). Even my brother was thinking Little would be one of the shooters before Peverley. Seriously? Gomez and Gionta > Kovy and Peverley for shootouts. Just saying.


W00T
- OK so defensively it's a little better, but the minute you forgot about it there was a goal...stop that.
- Goalies switched their water bottles for something harder: Halak's had smooth beer, Pavelec's had straight vodka.
- Guimauve, park your ass in front and SCREEN. They're not asking you to tip it wide, they want you to screen the goalie.
- I don't think I can take 1-0 games for the entire year. I also think Jaro and Price will have nervous breakdowns by December from it. Please someone else score!
- Andrei, how many times do you need to deke when you're just dumping the puck? Yes it's cool, but the puck went the other way...
- Winning goalie or not, I hold my breath whenever Jaro leaves his net to play the puck and suicide passes it to a defenceman's skates...
- Can we please win in regulation next time?
- Can we also just give Gionta the C already?

Ohhh snap!

Found this little zinger on the Habs page in case you're all getting pitchforky or deciding on who else you want to become a fan of.

Steak and a movie, Habs lose, Kovy gets adoration

Bet he'd score a goal, while locked in prison, and you'd never know it.

I have no idea what happened and only saw a few minutes of what looked like end to end early action. A lot of skating, a lot of almost goals bouncing off some magic force field at the goal line, a post hit, a lot of not burying any chances, a powerplay that almost gave up a shortie but Pricey scared the guy to shoot wide... But I had finished my delicious Portuguese steak and that's enough meat for me for a month. And seriously guys? You can and should be able to win games while giving up 2-3 goals... Right now it's Price playing goal and D, and if he could go a little further up the ice I bet he'd score a fucking goal!!! And if you're thinking of blamming him, shut the front door. (And if you're missing Huet, I laugh at your face). To win games he would have to have CONSECUTIVE FUCKING SHUTOUTS!!! All of which are absolutely impossible! (Unless you get him large Luongo equipment). Cammalleri scored though.

Habs kind of remind me of the Wild. Goaltending that's capable to win games, no goals being scored, lots of scrambling... Rinse. Repeat.

Actually this is all getting eerily similar to: the Montreal Impact. I swear I thought they would never win a game ever this season. This afternoon they just lifted the USL Cup. This is why you don't give up. Fans at the Bell Center? If you want to sit there and boo? Shut the fuck up and give me your ticket you ungrateful jackasses.

After dinner, we all went to see Law Abiding Citizen. Jamie Foxx got owned. My evening was great because of that. Haha, sucker.

Friday's W00T: Something Russian, something Bulldog, and thanks for nothing Stars

W00T #1: The Quebec Remparts had to trade Alexander Avtsin's rights to play their Europeans. They traded him to the Montreal Juniors! SCORE! Too bad they Juniors lost to the Remparts in a killjoy shootout... But! Hopefully Avtsin comes to play next year~!

W00T #2: Bulldogs beat the Peoria Rivermen (Baby Blues) 4-3 in OT. Sergei woke up finally. Darche got two goals, including the winner that was a tip off Weber's howitzer (brave man). Pyatt and Maxwell also scored, with Maxwell's coming off a rebound set up by Sergei. Bergeron had 3 assists, two on the powerplay (the last one 16 seconds into OT for the win). That's 5 assists in two games for him. What an evil powerplay the Bulldogs got there: Weber and Bergeron. DUCK AND COVER MOTHERFUCKERS!

Meh #1: Stars got all excited they beat the Preds, only to get shutout by the Booins. Guuuurrrr! Arrrrrrrgh! Then again, they just look like they're floating around when they play, really. Measuring sticks do not measure!

Sorry, Brunn. Your name made me do it.

I won't be home Saturday night. Brother's birthday dinner! So...GO HABS GO! C'mon Pricey, two of your shutouts are against the Sens when they had their usual roster! They're not that different, save for Kovy... Just watch out for those feet-pucks. And GO IMPACT GO! The USL championship is riiiiight there!

Habs 2, Skates 2, Avs 1: I mean, we got guys...

I'm sitting here in what I think is a fever but I can't check 'cause I got no thermometer. It kind of feels like watching Gionta get a nice shot at the net only to have it bounce of Cammy as he gets crosschecked from behind to no call and then moments later while Cammy has caught an edge and has fallen, pokes at the puck but gets called for tripping a guy who came zooming in over his stick. IT'S THAT FUCKING AGGRAVATING GUYS! (Not you, Habs, I'm talking to the paid off Zebras).

Maurice Richard probably would have punched a ref by now
- Nice player intro. Pass the mic and call your name. And then...there he was... MARKOV!!! And then the sound cut off when he was saying something after the long applause. What did he say?! I can't read his lips! They don't move right!
- Hammer's 2nd on the PP. Yes, we know RDS, we finally scored first. Hallefuckinglujah.
- Price is the Big Red Ace now. His new mask looks good out there. Kept the team in it all night. Of course, he's also still the King of Weird Goals that are mostly bouncing off his own players but whatever.
- The Markovian Hole wasn't too bad tonight. I can say they actually looked capable for the first time to exit the zone. A little bit more aggressiveness would help though...
- Like you, Gui! WTF was that? You let a guy go by you (who flicks a puck towards the net and bounces it off Belle's foot to deflect it in). You take weaksauce shots at the net that do nothing and go nowhere. Did you even hit anyone tonight? Frankly you're showing me how useless you are becoming... And if benching AK46 gave him the right idea, what's your excuse Guimauve?
- I'm thinking Lapierre's ankle surgery has affected him. He doesn't look the same anymore. Shows flashes of it but I don't know what's wrong with him.
- Chipper is playing heaps better now. He and Dag have some good ol' Bulldogs chemistry going. Laraque is ok, but when he's not hitting HARD he's a facking totem pole.
- Puck control was better. The trick is simple, D to D, turn pass to Gomez who's going full speed ahead, he weaves into the zone like a basketball player and sets up.
- I like that you guys are shooting, but uh...shoot lower?
- SuperPleky's goal was simple: don't rely on the idiot refs to actually pay attention that the puck hit the netting. Unfortunately after that, the Avs got away with EVERYTHING until Darcy Tucker made it hard not to call something.
- I think Hal Gill needs a smaller stick. His stickhandling when he's trying to move a puck is akin to stickhandling with a two-by-four. He's not bad when he's poking and sweeping pucks away though. And his teammates understand his liability in skating and cover him well.
- Speaking of the Treant, that's some eagle eyed ref down there. I mean a toppled over Hal Gill gets caught for "holding" if you can call that holding. I didn't know two players tangling up was holding. I mean you missed the blatant crosscheck in the slot, the unnecessary punching of Gio after the whistle (roughing anyone?), the biiiiig long hook on Lapierre that stopped him from getting to the puck, the holds behind the Avs net, I didn't think the hit on Gomez was a penalty but I didn't like the extra shove to the head he got that could have been one. Are we using AHL refs now? The ones ironically sponsored by Great Glasses in Bulldogs games? Was Koharski Jr there? Did he need a doughnut?
- They also didn't notice 7 Habs for that last flurry with the empty net. Um...?
- And yes, Patches is a big strong kid. He looks cuddly too. Avs thought so too. Gave him a big hug that put him offside. I mean hugging a guy you can't stop is totally legal. Avs players just want some love I guess. I mean, they are the Nordiques...
- Anderson? Yea well, I dunno. He plays out of this world every beginning of the season. Check back towards December when you're yelling at him and Budaj to be better.
- That mad scramble at the end? Yea, wtf, anti-climatic forcefield.

Habs deserved better. It's the kind of loss that leaves a sour taste in your mouth because it ends up being about the refs controling a game poorly to the point where everyone leaves frustrated. I'm cautioustly optimistic for Saturday. But I saw some things that were promising! Yes, that's Martin's "system" that we saw in preseason. It does work when the players work. Also saw them actually win board battles. Shocking! I know! Now, how about yelling at Gui to move his fucking ass and hit something? Or yell at him to shoot better? AK46 doesn't need any more yelling. Gui cost us a goal tonight. Guimauve, you are officially the Goat of the Game.

But I'm happy SuperPleky is back, playing dirty, and ready to party.

Of schadenfreude

You can call it a little bit of poetic justice, perhaps. What with the way TSN was just buying and selling everything Burke was feeding them with the pugnacity, testosterone, truculence, belligerence, and whatever. Most hockey fans didn't really buy it, or cared to buy it. Maybe Toronto fans got a little excited. They would have to, though. There's always a glimmer of hope on every team as the season starts.

Then there was talk of the "big four" on defence would be better than the big 3 of the old Habs, which just made me ill. Especially considering Komisarek, Beauchemin, and Exelby were part of that (I have no idea who #4 is... Schenn?). And while Markov got knocked out thanks to a freak injury, Pierre McDouche was talking about how Markov will suffer without Komisarek on his pairing, and will be picking glass out of his teeth. By then it was just getting rediculous, and Habs fans alike knew better than that, as it was Markov who made Komisarek look good.

And now they're 0-5, with less points than the Islanders who are the same but got the loser point more in less games (hey, we're good neighbors and gave you guys the 1 pity point) and look like they're getting worse and worse every game. They're also down to the bottom of the goaltending bin. Hell I have no idea who's netminding for the Marlies anymore as they're both called up now.

Since the start of the season, the jokes have been flowing non-stop. It was funny for a while...but as the Leaves spiraled more and more...it stopped being funny. Right now? It's just sad.

What is funny is that Komisarek is at the center of it all. But even that's getting old and actually not surprising to Habs fans considering how well we know him. Only we were lucky our PK unit was able to cover that all up. Smoke and mirrors!

And while the Leaves could rot for all I care, it annoys me because I'm still waiting for an epic Habs/Leafs playoff series. But the schadenfreude is drying up. I don't like kicking people when they're down.

Unless they're Bruins, of course.

Of turkey and turkeys

I'm not very fond of turkey, but I am quite fond of the day off. In fact, in the world I plan to take over (either quietly or hostile, I've not decided yet) I would declare every Monday a Thanksgiving so we can all sit at home, relax, and give thanks to various thing we may not all agree on. Of one thing I am thankful of: I'm not a Leafs fan. The other thing I'm thankful of: I'm not a Canucks fan.

And here I thought Canadiens fans were awful...

So while we may not have won the game in Vancouver, we apparently left our mark by smacking one of the creepy twins (Daniel) with a puck on the foot and he's now out 4 to 6 weeks. Apparently news of this was greeted with...cheers? Aren't these guys like the Kostitsyns, in that they're joined at the hip, so when one goes down the other gets useless? Were these not the guys who took advantage of my tired and weakened team and pulled out a gazillion points on them for the first win of their season? Not that I care, but wow... When I heard the story of "panic" at the beginning of the season when the Curse of the Contract Extension went out in full force, I'm starting to believe their ranking of 5th most worst fans in the NHL... And sorry, you can't trade Luongo. You have him for life now.

Another thing I'm thankful for: I'm not a Nordiques fan. Forever dreaming the impossible dream...

Really? Can Quebec City actually support an NHL team again? I would love it. Red Bull seems to sponsor plenty up there. For one, it would take the heat of my Habs. But first that damn arena needs to be rebuilt (or a new one alltogether as it would be impossible to share with the Remparts). And second, which sorry team gets to move up there? Islanders? Thrashers? Panthers? I was hoping Tampa Bay as that would kill two birds with one stone (NHL team, the trio of Francophone Saviours). Third, who gets bumped out of the division? Bet ya Boston goes Atlantic. Which would probably make Boston happy, actually. But here's something that bothered me recently while the Habs were going through their ownership changes... Why didn't Pelladeau just buy the damn team back then to keep it there? Why the sudden interest now?

So what am I thankful for on the Habs front?

Well I'm thankful for Carey Price, having stolen us 4 points to the best of his abilities. And when the team will play better, so will he. I'm thankful for Brian Gionta. I've mentioned before how I've always been a fan of the guy, and his timely goals always give the team a chance at a victory. I'm thankful for Andrei Markov. Without the General, it will be harder to get a victory, but imagine how it must be for him right now? Sitting at home, trying to heal as fast as possible, watching his team struggle to get any wins without him... It must be hell. I'm thankful for Mike Cammalleri. He's just itching to score, and I'm sure he will, but he's got this opportunistic value that was rare on this team last year. I'm even thankful for Gomez, who may float around like Kovy, but is it not cool when he zooms down the ice with the puck like a Harlem Globetrotters? Also you can't knock his pride. There's word a dumbass tossed a Habs jersey onto the ice after the Calgary game, and he came back out to pick it up. I think he was also the Rangers player I saw who picked up one of the "Go Habs Go" banners in the 0-5 comeback game... I'm thankful for Josh Gorges, who's grown nicely since coming here. And while he's not Markov, he's busting his arse nightly to make up for that huge hole.

No one ever said this game was easy, and the Habs never get anything easy... So we can only be thankful we have a team to cheer for, through the good and the bad, and right now they could use our support as they do what they can to play through these problems. And while it may look like we're in the running for the Taylor Hall sweepstakes or whatever it is this year, when the bodies return, we can watch them get right back on track.

Habs 2, Oilers 3: Message sent? Maybe after two periods...

Let me explain something to everyone, and yes that includes you Benoit Brunet. Whether your shot total ends up being 34-17 or not is absolutely meaningless if you're mindlessly tossing the puck at the net or seemingly aiming for the team crest. Why do you think everytime our point men shoot, it either bounces wide or bounces off a player point blank and causes a loss of the zone or a breakaway, while on the other side point shots cause all kinds of problems, bounces, and tip-ins? It's quality, which has to do with coverage, which we're sucking donkeys on for the most part... These past few games it's been way too easy to just walk up to the net and shoot, and the size of Price won't matter from that angle either.

Slowly getting there boys. After the 3rd goal, Coach Martin called a time out for a chat (not as intense as Torts') that...slowly started to get results. I mean you know, all night the guys had some chances but nothing really cohesive for 39 minutes. Gionta took charge of that with 30 seconds left in the second to give us some hope, but the Oilers came out in the 3rd with their own lessons learned about squandered games. Oh and The Beard (Mara) going after Brule for that headshot on Chipper just earned him some brownie points. How's that for ironic though. After Quinn went on and on about players having no respect for one another in reaction to Souray's injury the other night, one of his own goes out and gives our guys a classic headshot, blindsided style. Lucky for us, Chipper's tougher than most players. Probably would have gone after Brule himself but I think he was getting off anyway.

Speaking of Chipper, I think his line played great tonight. We even saw Laraque actually hustle to get back on a play. I don't think I ever saw him skate that fast. And Patches was excellent on that line. Perhaps putting him there is beneficial, as when BGL is on the ice everyone's Laraque Senses are tingling so the ice opens up a bit... Chipper protects the boards and the blue line simultaneously while Patches zips around for openings.

The penalty kill was heaps better than the last two games, but I'm cautiously optimistic on it because the Oilers missfired a lot on one of them. The powerplay, however, is in need of practice. I'm hoping Bergeron will be able to boost it when he joins in, as that's his specialty. Weber was used, but the problem with the kid is last year he caused way too many shorthanded goals against. Tonight, we saw him hustle back to make up for his error. He's still learning!

Tonight's Goat of the Game is: Andrei Kostitsyn.

Andrei, Andrei, Andrei... Here I thought you finally broke your slumber. And after the first shift you had tonight, I was sure I wasn't dreaming. And then you lazily tossed a weak pass through the center of your zone for no reason right on to an Oiler's stick, made no attempt to recover your error, put your team into a scramble, which eventually put your team into a hole. Voila, genius. And thus, you were benched for the rest of the game.

FYI, last year it took the coach (I think it was Gainey by then) an entire season to pressbox his lazy ass for punishment.

Finally heading HOME and never going back
- We can all be good fans and thank Price for 2 games on this fucking long trip. Last I looked there was supposed to be a couple of guys playing on this team who really could have given us and him at least ONE...
- Every error becomes a headache. Or a goal against. Work on it.
- I bet on Cammy. He wanted to score. He wanted to score so badly. But he only got an assist tonight. He gets a point, and so do I!
- Why was Hal Gill on the ice with an empty net at the end, you ask? (Other than Hammer having problems). Because you need someone who has the sense to block the empty net like a log. The Treant and The Beard did the job.
- The Beard was pretty solid tonight. Came back from his fighting penalties extra pushy too.
- Hammer's first goal of the year is brought to you by Horcoff's stick.
- Gomez changed out of his gear for the interview really quick... Crabby Khabby was still in his goalie shorts.
- We should be doing better in the East. Home opener is Thursday. The Beard vs Darcy Fucker? Bank on it.

Message sent

It was right after the trade deadline, two games before Carbo was fired, when he finally bag skated the guys. By then the season was nearing a close and the Western heartache had broken the team completely. Coach Martin did it after 4 games, with one more Western game to deal with.

Coach Martin, we salute you.

Canucks, sorry we left a hole in your visitor dressing room...and thankfully for us, Pricey has tough nuckles. I think the Defence will pay for the damages.

No luck in Vancouver

Even the Als can't win in Vancouver. It's like a blackhole...

But Price came to play, and then found himself absolutely alone in his homecoming, hoping to turn around the blackhole. Knew it would happen. They used up all their abilities last night in Calgary. However give the kid props. His parents looked more upset than he did. No tears a la Luongo. No baseball cap either. He was right there on the bench, with his team, with his mask still on: saying I'm here guys, we lose together. And as Dave Stubbs said, "If they're men, every #Habs defenceman will apologize to Price tonight for having hung him out to dry at home"

Meh.
- What happened to our PK? I hear that Metro should be back for Edmonton though, thank god...
- Chipper may be skating his way back to Hamilton... Though we did get to see the REAL Chipchura a few times...the rest of the time he just showed why Maxwell or Pyatt have jumped over him on the depth chart.
- Spacek, I love you, but everytime you block a shot it ends up in the net. Hey I didn't know Komisarek was still here!
- Mara is our best defenceman. He also picked up another assist! Maybe I should start betting on him...
- Weber was absolutely burned...
- You know they're tired when Gorges walks into the net...
- Dagger wiffed a golden opportunity, proving he really is like Higgins but with none of his defensive abilities.
- AK46 HAS RISEN!
- If I see any more of those half-assed dump ins for a change that gets caught in the neutral zone that causes another breakaway one more time I'll scream.
- I didn't know you could get a penalty for chatting.
- Pylons!
- You know you've hung your goalie out to dry when Benoit Brunet is totally upset about what he's seeing and not blaming the goalie for once.
- Could have been 7-0...
- Pens got blanked by the Coyotes 3-0. Now there's a team that played like a team in a perfect, Dave Tippett (boring) road game.
- Better show up in Edmonton before it starts to get rediculous... Playing 10 minutes out of 60 does not make a hockey game. And exiting the first period 14-4 shots against does not help. Fix it.

Habs 3, Flames 4: Public Transportation Blows!

I'm counting on you, Andrei!

Nothing sucks more than walking into the Metro after work only to hear the chimes of FAILURE. That's right. A massive power failure knocked out the entire thing for like ever. So I had to call my dad to come get me to bring me to my car as I have no idea how to get from the heart of downtown to Namur by bus. At least not by any means that'll take less than a year to complete. FUCKING MONTREAL METRO. (Yea, you hear me Mayor?)

So anyway, Calgary eh? My brother calls the Flames the Calgary Phil Kessels. RDS revelation of the evening: Flames defencemen are point productive. Thank you Captain Obvious. They also enjoy 4 man forechecking.

Meanwhile I'm convinced the Habs plan is to spend a lot of time cycling and board battling in their zone to get the other goalie cold.

Things appear to be coming together. They played a lot better than the first two games and actually managed to outshoot for once. Even when down, there was still no quitting. And haha Pleky outmuscled Phaneuf like every time. It was hilarious. Sweet backhand goal too. Was it like 10 seconds left in the second to tie it up? Watch it now, the Pleky has a fire lit under his arse.

Gui and Gomez also got some pretty awesome goals too. Cammalleri owned Iginla along the boards for a perfect pass to Gomez. Gui's came after mass confusion totally caught Kipper off guard. Badabing, backhand. If he had missed I would have jumped through my TV to slap him. Mara quietly gobbled up two more assists.

Unfortunately Chipper's linemates were totally not helping and he got blamed for the first goal. How?! He was working his guy while his teammate watched, and immediately shifted attention to the shooter while still dealing with the first guy. Dude can't get a break... Though I gotta say, what was Nystrom doing fighting Chipper? No contest... (Never mind Nystrom's hattrick which wasn't a hattrick 'cause the third one actually bounced off Gorges).

And poor Gorges. He was absolutely everywhere, but didn't have an easy time tonight. In the end he got pretty fed up and tried to save the game by himself. We salute your effort Gorges!

And I've no idea what to do with Andrei. He has totally taken over Kovy's ENIGMA nickname. On one hand he's going full steam ahead like the power forward sniper he is, and then misses a pass that would just require a little reach and very little effort to receive. But I'm just going to chalk it up as someone trying to learn a system he has never ever seen or done in his life. So it'll take some time for him... But you don't need to speak Russian to understand the words "SHOOOOOOOT!"

Patches is getting there too. That penalty was fucking weak though. Two minutes for muscling down someone with a shoulder with both players getting their sticks crossed defensively (ie. 2 minutes for playing hockey), while ignoring the trippings by the Flames not long before... Loved when Gionta got dumped randomly at the line, which would usually be called interference, but not to Mike Leggo. And yes I read Gomez's mouth as he yelled to the ref "What the fuck was that?!"

In the end Kipper > Halak tonight, even with the quick whistle near the beginning when the Habs threatened to score. Though what's up with Halak and Calgary? He played both games last year too. OH! New mask for Jaro~!

Got every reason to put a W00T here 'cause it was still entertaining!
- Moen has 3 points in 3 games now!
- Weber did very nicely tonight.
- Oh right MA Bergeron was signed this morning to help on defence (regardless of how he's known more for offense) to a super cheap contract. Currently conditioning in Hamilton. Demographics also fulfilled, RDS seems pleased.
- SERGEI SMILED after he scored on Sanford in Bulldogs practice, so here's hoping he's "getting" it.
- I'm hoping the team has a fire under it's arse for tomorrow
- Don't embarrase Pricey in his homecoming!!!

Variable skies with a chance of Weber

Weather the storm, Habs fans! Don't listen to Joel "Chicken Little" Bouchard. Yes, we know, the loss of Markov--one of the Leagues top Defencemen--sucks big time. And thankfully Bob isn't running around panicking like some of the pundits online and on air. Losing Rhino doesn't help, of course, but unless you listen to the opinions of 120% (also known as L'Antichambre with a 10% more chance of douchebaggery than 110% if that were ever possible), Gill and Mara are quite the duo of TREES more than capable of playing defence. In fact their "sticks and reach" was probably on Ron Wilson's cheat sheet under "strengths". (Right where the screen cuts off). Sure they're not as flashy or elegant as the General, NO ONE CAN BE MARKOV! And why does no one stop to think "hey, how come no one signed UFA Marc-André Bergeron?". Who knows, but I don't care. As for trading, stop mentioning Soupy in Chicago please... Not only do we not have the cap room, but what would you sacrifice for that? And what would you DO when Markov comes back? Besides, Sergei's fit of confusion totally negated any trade value he ever had. And shut up about Halak. We need two number ones until the system settles in.

Anyway, Swiss Mister 2.0 is up! And fits under the cap! And Sergei has sucked it up, put the purse away, and headed to Hamilton like a good boy.

Oh and if we enter November going 2-12, THEN you can start shitting the bed.

Home Wreckers 2, Slugs 1 (OT): Team Canada second guessing their goalies yet?

The 2009-2010 Montreal Canadiens: Stunningly ruining home openers everywhere.

And while I know it's only been two games into the season, but you gotta wonder how Team Canada's Olympic Committee is thinking these days about their selection of goalies. Not that I care, because I'd rather have Pricey here and on vacation during the Olympics. But Bobby Lou did NOT look good at all the past two games they lost, and Fleury is well...Heartattack Fleury, Brodeur is OLD, Cam Ward is chewing on his new contract extension, and I wonder if Steve Mason would be allowed to play considering his history of "back problems" that Columbus don't want to risk him. I digress though. Back to the Habs!

That's 77 saves and counting.

We knew it would be tough because the Sabres have actual hockey players. This game was a bit like the first. Habs were stuck in their own zone, couldn't get set up, and when they did the Sabres kept everything to the outside. Then the Sabres caused all kinds of problems and Metro had to tickle one of them with his stick to do something. Never good to see one of your best PKers in the box. Shot, blocked in front, goal. Price shrugs.

Seems the rest of the period was spent trading penalties, and everyone wants to punch Kaleta. Patches nearly tips one in but is held back, Gorges misses a backdoor Markovian play by a few centimeters, AndreiK jumps to life but falls back asleep again, BGL checks someone and makes me smile. Then Rhino gets a penalty for coming to Gorges' aid after he gets dumped for protecting Price on a save. Super Pleky will not be denied in the effort category, and almost kills the whole penalty himself in the offensive zone. However, Rhino blocks a shot with his foot and is gone for the night. All of Habs Land pours a few more beers. And he was doing so well!!!

Pleks then slaps Gaustad around to protect his goalie. The Super Pleky is very, very protective of his goalies.

Deep into the second period, the Sabres suddenly decide to avenge Miller's injury last year by having two guys punch Gomez. Really? You need two guys to fight Gomez? HMCS Hal Gill and Gorgeous Gorges realize what's going on and cruise in with the gloves off. For some reason the Habs get an extra 2, while the Sabres get nothing for the "third man". Doesn't matter because soon after Derek Roy gets his panties in a bunch because Pleks brushed his arm as he skated by and we go 4-on-4.

We soon learn that our dear Glen Metropolit is injured upper body. More beer is poured.

The 4-on-4 goes to a penalty again as AndreiK falls for Tyler Myers' long legs. Doesn't matter because the Habs decide to play better shorthanded than at even-strength. Best chance comes when Miller bobbles the puck and play is whistled dead because the Habs might score. Lapierre gets attacked for his effort and Moen smiles at Kaleta. The next best chance is Cammy to Hammer back door, but they keep tipping it wide. I didn't realize Higgins was still playing.

Naturally what's a Sabres game without witnessing Derek Roy's lovely dives. Alexandre Despatie should start taking notes. Maybe he'd win more gold medals...

Since we're on a perpetual penalty kill, Habs defend by offending. Travis Touchdown crashes the net and scores, literally. Well technically he was crosschecked into it, but Lindy Ruff still whined about it.

Longest 5 minutes ever to end the second. Hammer spots Gui fresh off the bench who breaks out with a weak backhand. Miller Time saves.

CBC interviews Gomez, and brings up the vertically challenged question. Gomez: "Well, you know, we're working on our height... quarters under our beds and all that." CBC also gives Pacioretty 5 different pronounciations before getting it right.

The third period started off with AndreiK making Pleks and Patches' life miserable. You know who was good with Pleks and Patches last year? Kovy. Just saying. Best chance is when Gomez nearly does his signature tip-in on the fly but the puck never reaches him. Patches allows the whole team to change while forechecking the whole Sabres team for a good 30 seconds. AK and Patches nearly get a goal each but nothing is going their way. AndreiK seems to only appear in the 3rd, and I'm wondering if he's got the flu... It was Sergei who used to drive Kaleta nuts. Unfortunately he's too busy painting his toenails. Meanwhile Travis Touchdown gives him a sly smile and a nod.

Montador decides suddenly to piledrive Lapierre's head into the end boards. Thankfully Lapierre's head is pretty hard... Habs can't lose any more bodies. The bench never looked so roomy.

I think the shocker of the 3rd period was seeing HMCS Hal Gill down low, and Gui playing defence. And it actually worked!

Price proves the haters wrong and stones Pominville from point blank. We somehow got to overtime.

Gomez and Gionta: The Go Line. Gomez breaks out from the right circle, passes to Gionta. Gionta cruises in and drops the pass for Gomez while heading for the net. Gomez slaps it off the end boards and Gionta scores from behind the net, batting average 1.000, Habs Land explodes, Buffalo is stunned.


Overtime City. Again. Habs wanna party like it's 1993.

W00T!
- This win was brought to you by Carey Price.
- My brother thinks Hal Gill is a Treant.
- I love watching Gionta annoy players twice his size.
- Travis Touchdown: Two game, two goals. This is why he always wears his cup.
- Every time Spacek blocks a shot, Habs Land stops breathing.
- Sergei, get your ass to Hamilton NOW!
- Let's go Bulldogs! *clap clap clap clap clap clap*

Because it's a super Saturday!
- Leafs still suck. Even the Monster couldn't help. Capitals mantra is who needs defense when you've got offense.
- Whalercanes suck. And TK tried to fight Chara. We need an Operation Save Tom Kostopoulos!
- Sens suck. Rangers won their home opener, and Del Zotto got the first star. Leclaire was whining about the goal but dude was 2ft out of his crease. No love from there!
- Khabby just put all of Sam Gagner's efforts in vain by crapping the bed with 30 seconds left. But Gagner beat up a Flame and scored a goal. I wished he'd give Sergei a call and tell him to earn his life...
- Pens nearly lose to the Islanders, but win in a shootout. Tavares got his first goal.
- Detroit is defeated again by the Blues. No you can't trade for Halak...
- Chicago blanked Florida in Finland. Niemi was not going to be made a fool in his homeland.
- Brodeur looked horrible in his milestone game, and a 5-2 loss to the Flyers. Just saying.
- Thrashers might be moved to Winnipeg, rejoice and defeat the Bolts 6-3 in reaction to the news. Evander Kane made them look silly.
- The Yotes are currently up 6-3 over the Kings. ROBERT LANG SCORED! I miss him... Unfortunately all 500 fans of the team cheered.

Don't Panic! Everything is totally under control

At least we think so.

If there was any attempt to make sense from the summer acquisitions, it was based on what went on behind closed doors and what happens when the Habs lose Markov. Obviously the first kneejerking reaction is tears and booze. Lots of booze. The second reaction is to jump off a bridge. HOWEVER! I would like to remind you this is only game 1 out of 82 in October, and not April.

Also, Czech out the new pairing: it's Head Pigeon and his childhood friend Hammer.

Yea, I know Hammer and Spacek are getting older, and neither can fully replace the abilities and minutes of General Markov... But this was Spacek's role in Buffalo, so it's nothing new for him. HC Martin's new experiment will be to see if these new guys coupled with the regulars can share the wealth of Markov's minutes. It's also an opportunity not only for the guys to step up, but maybe we'll see a Bulldog come in and assert himself in lineup. Maybe (and most likely) Weber will be called up, who was one of the few bright spots in last years playoffs. Maybe Subban will get a little taste. Maybe Carle will dip his toe in the waters of real hockey (and hopefully not get concussed).

I'm a pretty optimistic girl. Frankly if you sit on your hands hemming and hawing at the problems, you'll just get old fast. That's my philosophy and I'm sticking to it. So here's my plus/minus on the situation!

PLUS
- No Olympics for Markov. I appologize to Team Russia, but the Habs come first. He'll be coming back just in time for the Olympic break which means he'll be fresh and ready to get in shape for the final sprint.
- Josh Gorges. Last year when Komisarek was knocked out of the lineup, Gorges took over his spot and got to learn first hand what Markov does. That goal last night, from the setup to following Cammy for the rebound, was pure Markov.
- It's not about one guy. Yes it's hard to replace a guy like Markov, but there are 6 other defensemen that need to step up. It's an opportunity for others to prove themselves. Plus there are two goalies more than capable to do the job, with Price being a 3rd defenseman as he likes to involve himself with the play.
- Hello Pittsburgh! Yes we don't have a Malkin, nor a Crosby, but Gonchar was knocked out way longer last year and the Pens were fairly crap for a long stretch. Their season didn't end so badly, I think...
- Gionta. He won't allow the team to sulk. Why, I get perky just watching him play. There's a reason he's one of the guys with an A pinned to his shirt. Last year's team always appeared to sulk and play beaten when scored upon. I don't really see this mentality this year, and he's a big factor in that.

MINUS
- Call for the collapse! The adjustments might not be instant, and the panic button may be pushed too soon. Already I'm hearing "fans" saying we should just tank our way to the lottery pick. Hogwash.
- Media fodder! Oh lord it's going to be annoying to hear this new "question" put to the room. What? Tired of the captaincy issue? Size issue? Hal Gill's foot speed issue?
- Fantasy Teams. I'm really sorry for all those who picked Markov, as he's usually a solid batch of points. Maybe he'll tear the League a new one when he returns to compensate?
- Breezer. Apparently in the wake of this problem, there is word that Breezer has offered his services for cheap. Yes Breezer we know you're a great and lovable team player, but dude, no, you just retired. Suck up those tears and get yourself Nascar ready. Also I'm thinking Dandy might be better for an emergency veteran pick up on D... My brother said Chelibot is still available and I nearly spit up my dinner. MAYBE IF I HAD A TIME MACHINE AND GOT THE YOUNGER VERSION!!!
- Other Malarkey. Apparently some droogs in Leafs Nation claim this is retribution for TK's hit on Mike Made-of-Glass Van Ryn. Really, and I mean this in the fairest and truest sense of a rival fan: fuck off. That guy would get injured in a slight breeze...

A team builds character through adversity. It's still early enough in the season to work around this little setback. As fans, the best we can do is shine the #79 beacon high off Place-Ville-Marie and hope for a speedy recovery. After all, victory is never a given, even with your number 1 player healthy, and that mantra over the rink door isn't for show.

Habs 4, Leafs 3 OT: Carey Price vs. The World

For a week now I've been battling a bug that wasn't quite the flu, wasn't quite a cold, and a mixture of allergies because I live next to a field of ragweed. So instead of partying with the Tweeps, I went home and snuggled under my lovely soft throw and readied myself for some Leaf hate. About thirty minutes later they finally dropped the puck.

Can someone tell me why and how the lower bowl was half empty in the so-called center of the hockey universe on opening night?!

-----------------------

It took maybe 50 seconds for the Leafs to put a shot on goal via a 90-foot floater. Meanwhile Komisarek was already high sticking Gomez. Van Massenhover gives Burke's team the pity vote and eats his whistle.

About 5 minutes in and Laraque reminds Colton Orr he should have stayed in New York. Whatever, Bouillon used to beat up Colton Orr for us. Soon after, Rosehill got bored and desided to fight with Moen. Komisarek high sticks Andrei Kostitsyn, who didn't really care much about it then 'cause he was still asleep. Habs fans aren't surprised. Van Massenoven is high on Nyquil. Of course Komisarek starts thinking he's an offensive defenseman, but gets post. Price stops it all.

If you wanted to know the story of the game, it's Komisarek's penalties. Not the ones he didn't get, though. If Van Massenhoover actually called him for everything he'd just be in the box for 60 minutes. Finally after not getting caught the first time, Komisarek is called on a 4-minute high stick while trying to make Gomer uglier. It takes 1 second for Gionta to score. Leafsland gets quieter, if that were possible considering there's no one here.

The fun is negated when Hal Gill left his blinker on while beind the net. Grabs to Poni, the girly line. We leave the first tied at 1 after Komisarek slashes Markov who gives him a "whatever dude" look, and then cross checks Patches after the whistle. BGL whispers sweet nothing in his ear (here's a hint George, PUNCH HIM). Price haters have boarded the bandwagon.

RDS keeps trying to fan the flames by reminding us all it's only the first game of a new team and delivers the credit where it's due to Big Red in the crease. Oh and the Bruins getting massacred by the Caps.


Second starts a bit like the first. Toronto's fourth line giving some fits, Habs players not used to Price playing the puck and give it away, Komisarek tries to kill Gionta who takes the shot and bounces back up. Big Red saves the world. But if you thought Hal Gill was slow, nothing is slower than watching BGL on a breakaway. Worked too! Metro works behind the net, Moen cashes in. Toskala's save percentage drops below 700. Meanwhile Van Massendouche allows everything but Dagger's weak little hook. You know how dangerous those can be. But Gill gets lost in his legs and Mara gets lost in his beard. A weaksauce 5-on-3 and Stajan tips in behind Price. Cammy and Gomez pass around in the wrong direction and Komisarek elbows AK46 in the head who responds with a tap on the feet. Yawn. Somewhere Moen railroaded Grabovski and all of Montreal cheered.

Second period ends with 30 shots on Big Red Gum. Business as usual when in Hog Town. If not for Price being Price it would be 6-2 by now. Senator Demers tells us Komisarek is the Komisaurus pre-Lucic. Too bad they only play Boston for the first time this year December 5th, unless Pronger gets him first.

Third period gets odd. On one hand Habs fans except a comeback. On the other hand Leafs fans expect a comeback. Spacek dives to save a 3-on-1 from happening, earns brownie points. Gionta gets post. Komisarek throws Moen into Toskala who blockers him in the face. Not much of a fight when your guy is a little dazed from two hits but we know Komisarek picks his battles. Van Massenjerk give an extra two to Moen and Stajan can't miss standing in front of the net while Price gets tangled in Markov. All of Montreal stops breathing when Markov hobbles off the ice.

An injury to Markov is a dark cloud of worry. However, now we have Spacek to fail in the corners but lead the rush a lot better than Hammer.

The Leafs have tossed 40 shots at Price who yawns.

Gionta wants another goal and causes all kinds of havoc with his buddy Gomez. AK46 fell asleep on a wide open net. Sergei would have burried that. Just saying. But the winds of change blow as Komisarek aims to break the record for penalties in one game, and Metro tips in a shot from Gorges. Somewhere Guy Carboneau smiled.

Leafs ice the puck for the remaining minute of play and we hit overtime. Leafs are aiming for a shootout. Cammy has other ideas. With the entire bench on the edge of their seats, the world explodes when JOSH GORGES converts to a power forward and bashes the rebound.

No need to sacrifice sticks this year.

W00T!
- Pumpkin pie is yummy.
- Big Red Gum is hot!
- Gionta tapes his whole stick.
- Habs outhit the Truculent Leafs 47-22
- Happy Birthday Coach Martin!
- MARKOOOOOOOOOOOV ;o; Apparently cut by Price's skate.
- Komisarek is dead to me. Boo him loudly my friends.