Habs 4, Whalercanes 2: Eat crow

The trolls have slunk back under their bridges. The slight aberration in Price's play fixed by a second period of 21 shots, including a penalty shot by a fairly good player of the Staal variety. A menu of crow shall be served shortly.

And those asking why Price hasn't stolen any games for them? Voila.

Clearly it was my fault...
- Seriously. Every time I take my dog for a walk something happens. Spent the whole 2nd walking the dog.
- I wondered if they all caught an intestinal infection in the 2nd period.
- For once, I'd like it if Therrien used his damn time out when the team goes off the rails instead of waiting for his damn icing. (Hint: they ice the puck a lot...how do you  know which to call it on)?
- The bonus of 42 saves is it re-balances Price's save percentage.
- Brandon Prust also played out of his mind.
- He and Eller ended with a goal and two assists, while Galchenyuk pitched in for some solid assistance. And I'm sure Pierre McGuire is thinking up a way to backtrack on his assessment of Eller.
- Don't hold your breath on that, by the way.
- Don't hold your breath in second periods with the Habs either.
- But Eller's goal was fantastic. He just came out of nowhere, backdoor. Usually WE are the victims of those.
- Josh Gorges, POWER FORWARD. No really.
- Did you see Emelin's spin-o-rama on the first goal?
- Shut up, Eric Staal.
- You too, Skinner.
- You know, considering Marc Staal's eye ate a puck the other night, you'd think the Staals would stop the macho crap and put on visors? Still visor-less.
- Then again, I bet Pronger would still growl something about cold dead hands and visors or whatever. Dude can't even play with his kids without some light or noise problems affecting him.
- PK Subban has 6 goals and 15 points in 18 games, including tonight's BOMB on the powerplay. And apparently Gaston Therrien thinks he should do more offensively. Also played 27 minutes.
- Could stop turning the puck over in front of your net, please? Especially while on a power play.
- I wish everyone would hound the puck the way Gallagher does. Pin him to the boards, he'll still go through you for the puck.
- The Hurricanes stole the HONK!HONK!HONK! LET'S GO CANES! from the Caps.
- I feel really bad for Weber. He finally gets to play, his play is rather odorous to say the least (that penalty shot call was weaaaaaaaaaaaaaak though), and then ends up injured. Gee I wonde why this happened? Maybe because he's been siting forever!
- Ryder was benched in the third. This is why they won. (Well, it helped).

42 saves, bitches. The answer to life, the universe, and everything.

Except a game star, apparently.

Habs 3, Devils 5: Take a pass

Don Cherry just bitched about a guy who makes 6.5 million dollars and how it's inexcusable for him to allow a guy walk around him and score...and I thought he was talking about Mike Cammalleri. (It was Phaneuf).

OK so immediate dividends, the team looked energetic. They had more movement, and more intensity. They showed more attack. They got another powerplay goal. Problem was they lost track of things. They need to be more aware of their surroundings. Elias' goal, usually the penalty kill box cuts that pass off but he blew in by everyone back door. Clarkson has 11 goals already, most of them on breakaways, came in from behind the D on a linechange and took advantage of Campoli to hid the puck for a perfect shot. Zubrus absolutely flew through two defencemen who looked like they didn't notice he was there until it was too late. Major killer tho was when Campoli decided to skate it out instead of chipping it out and fell on his ass causing a 3-on-fucking-0... Well yea, Price can work miracles but come on! That's just cruel.

So they got secondary scoring and a powerplay goal, but the first line... AK46 finds himself stuck on yet another line trying to get something going when he was doing just fine. We saw the AK46 moves that we haven't seen in years. The puck through the legs dipsy-doodle to the net highlight reel stuff. And yea, I'll say Cammy started off good...but man... I don't want to see the puck roll slowly off his stick and then watch him saunter off to the bench. I don't want to see him with a wide open net backdoor only to launch the puck into the netting. And I'm not going to put down Plekanec because the man only does EVERYTHING. This team needs Cammy to get his head out of his ass, pull out a box of pucks after practice, and start shooting. It's what he did when he first came here and couldn't score. It's what he needs to do now. And for once in your life win a fucking puck battle.

Eller: "It looked like the same old shit in the 3rd period." Gold. His line was great tonight. He almost got them within one but I don't even know how he missed. But he got them a goal already. His line was trying to get them more. For DD's line? Something was up with Cole (I'm told he's playing ill). He went to the room a few times and was dinged for a few penalties (two of which were bullshit players running into him). Patches was gone for a long time after he and Clarkson collided, which is worrisome. That screwed up a lot, and put more emphasis on the need for Pleky's line to get something going. And though Campoli's screw up pretty much killed the game, he did score a great goal during a very strong shift by the fourth line.

They had a meeting after the game, understandingly, and kept the media out for a long time. As Cunney said, he's got a frustrated group of players that know it wasn't enough to win. And as Gorges said they let him down, they let the fans down, and they let each other down. Now they head off on a pretty long road trip. Let's hope they use this time together well and can start playing better together.

We welcome our new babysitters

The keeper of our children! Finally, the Bulldogs have a coach! And an assistant coach too! And...they're BOTH called RANDY! I have a friend named Randy who's now head art dude in a London, Ontario video game company that may or may not exist (it's complicated).

Bonus: they're both ex-Whalers. WOO! BRING BACK THE WHALE! BRING BACK THE WHALE! Sorry, it's a habit.

To welcome Randy Cunneyworth and Randy Ladouceur, I hearby proclaim Brass Bonanza the new player introduction song for the Hamilton Bulldogs.

Yea baby!

So now Guy Boucher can officially take the rest of his staff with him to Florida. Damn you, Yzerman...

Oh and Kovalchuk's rediculous bending-of-the-rules-a-bit-too-much of a contract just got rejected. Should have made it 12 years like all the other rediculously long cap-bending contracts in the League. Looking at you Pronger/Richards/Zetterberg/Hossa.

Of course the joke's on us as Lou was really just doing some experimental social commentary on rediculous NHL contracts and greedy one-dimensional superstars. They ARE the Devils.

Speaking of contracts, I'm thinking Price is totally waiting for his birthday to sign his. August 16, marked.

Habs 2, Whalercanes 5: In which I expect every one of you to eat those hats (except the goalies)

I'm tired. I don't even want to comment on this game. All I'll say is BARFJOB and you'll need some BARF DETERGENT to clean it. So start cleaning.

Habs 1, Canes 1, Hamr 1 on the wrong net: Facepalm

See those targets?

Perhaps to prove a point, Coach Martini should tell the goalies to go work on the other rink and set this up for the remaining players. Place a pile of pucks on the ice and attach shock buzzers to their asses. If they don't shoot the puck fast enough on target or tip it fast enough, Kirk Muller gets to zap them.

But who am I kidding... Coach Martini forgot what might motivate players. Then again, he doesn't know when to call a timeout or to pull the goalie for the extra man, or to say "HEY YOU GUYS, TWO FUCKING POINTS AND SIXTY FUCKING MINUTES! DO IT!" That's Kirk Muller, who I think is getting contradicted by HC Jacques Martini by how befuddled they appear behind the bench.

Another thing that might work: look up urgency in the dictionary, rip out the page, circle the word and definition, paste it to the wall, and walk away.

Hey, not every player hails from Harvard University.

Time for the Habs Seder.

Question 1: Why on this night was Pyatt scratched when on every other night his energy is a big factor on the ice?

Question 2: Why on this night can we not leave the ice without losing more players to injury?

Question 3: Why on this night does Hamr not know how to pile drive the puck into the OTHER net?

Question 4: Why on this night do the Habs have to totally shit the bed and fall to 8th spot?

Bonus question 'cause Eliyahu has taken all the wine: Why on this night do the idiots in the cheap seats think it's proper to boo the only one on your home team that got a game star? DOUCHEBAGS.

Pick up your socks, boys. You're back in 8th.

Habs 3, Whalercanes 2 (Epic SO): Take this puck and shove it up your ass!

I came home for the best part.

After stuffing my face silly with copious amounts of sushi (SUSHI PIZZA: FOOD OF THE GODS!) my friends and I left Kanda all you can eat sushi and passed a truck that had TV screens around it (yea, my friend was so impressed he took a picture!) and I saw the score: 1st period Habs 1 Car 0. I went WOO! And then it switched to the 2nd period, Habs 1 Car 2. I went FUCK!

And as we stood chatting in the metro for what seemed a good half hour while train after train came and went, I couldn't help but think "Please, score. Please, score. I don't want to come home and hear that Price was hung out to dry again. I don't want to see the guys in another bag skate. I don't want to hear about another crappy outing. Just score more than one fucking goal!!!"

So I finally made my way to my car, parked behind the Burger King at Namur Metro, turned on CJAD with hesitation and heard...the score hadn't changed. I did hear Price making key save after key save, and Manny Legace using his fat to frustrate my already frustrated Habs. (Oh Carolina...just call up a kid if Leighton is injured now). Then I heard the only goal was caused by Super Pleky and the squire Master Maximilian Pacioretty converted. That made me slightly happier as I defrosted my car. Of course with like 5 minutes left someone had to take a penalty. Of course it was the Habs! But never mind because they almost scored shorthanded and then Andrei Kostitsyn just walked around the net and threw the puck in the gerenal direction and it walked through Fatty Legacy. Tied! Woo! Murray Wilson was ecstatic. I needed to use the washroom...

And then OT! This is the part I got to see. The only part that mattered. I saw Price beating people up in front of his net like he did long ago and it made me smile. I saw effort on the penalty kill after an accidental high stick made Spacek's life miserable. (Seriously, the man was a wreck while in the box. I just wanted to hug him). Kick save, pad save, glove save, dive, cleared. Shootout.

Carolina has a Ruutu and Jussi Fucking Jokinen. You do not want to go to a shootout with these guys... However Price was a cocky bastard and just scared the puck away. Perfect. And as the Habs tried to go five-hole on Fatty Legace with weak shots, when Lapierre stepped up I yelled "SHOOT TOP CORNER!" and he did, HUZZAH! Save of the year by Price to end it. Off the tip of his toe and on the fucking line. I swear the puck raspberried the Whalercanes. Then Price shot the fucker down the ice. And there was much rejoicing.

Max: "Hey TK, want to go for a beer later?" Tom: "Sure thing, Max. Can I get some bagels too?" Oh the formalities.

GAME!
- Price is the Master, and you will OBEY.
- And he was wearing the cowboys again!
- Pleky for president!
- L'Antichambre still says Lapierre saved the game. Maybe he did, but it was all Carey Price yo.
- I heard Andrei got mean and nasty like Sergei does. Then I saw it in the highlights. Sergei, never knew you came back!
- Sergei Samsonov looks like an elf. Brind'Amour is still fugly.
- Eric Cole may be the ruiner of our lives, but without hif BFF Eric Staal, he's pretty harmless.
- That shootout was EPIC. And long legs for the win.
- Guimauve is still pretty useless, and I refuse to wear his shirt until he HITS SOMEONE more than once. Twice even. Four time? OK, but I'd like him to do it for more than one game. Not asking you to be Guy Lafleur...Just be like Dustin Byfuglien or whatever.
- I was wondering if TK would fight anyone.
- The bench in the shootout was great. Everyone was on the edge of their seat. And when it was up to Price to end it, they were practically in each other's arms, all waiting to see what'll happen. Reminded me of 1993...
- Gionta come baaaaaaaaaaack ;o;

Put those points in the bank. Who cares if we beat the worst team around. Fatty Legace almost stole the game by being wide... I'm still calling this season "1993"!

Round 2: FIGHT!

And so the Stanley Cup pecking order continues with a rather animalistic theme. Well, sort of...

Whalercanes vs Bruins
Fear the Whale! ...or will it be Fail Whale. Either way, WhirlyWhale vs the Hated Bear Tribe of the East. Oh how I wish both teams could lose. Another thing I don't look forward to is hearing Don Cherry spew garbled words on why the hell the Leafs ditched Paul Maurice, since he's obviously awesome and brought the Whalercanes to the series all through his incredible coaching and not because Cam Ward finally woke up and realized "hey I done this shit before" or Staal and LaRose remembered the puck is supposed to go in the other net more than once or Jokinen thought it best to not wait for shootouts to do anything. Wow, that was quite the rant.

Eagles vs Penguins
I cry fowl. Capitals have the Weagle. Penguins are penguins. They've been fighting all year anyway, now it's time to take it to the next level. Caps, one word: Nedved.

Hawks vs Canucks
Two Native themed teams, though I personally only recognize the Stick'n'Rink C logo...

Either way this is what happened last time they met.

Ducks vs Dismembered Roadkill Wing stuck to a Tire
Flying Tires are fast, but Ducks got bite and kick (literally). And are a bunch of quacks. They're powered by George Parros' moustache and guided by Ryan Getzlaf's bald spot, and if allowed will eat Osgood alive.

Yes I wrote this after 2am. Oh Gremlins...

Priceberg dead ahead! Habs 1 Whalicanes 2 a powerplay goal and 48 shots against

Able to carry a team, a bunch of polar bears, maybe some lost penguins and a few seals all on his back and act like it's no big deal.

I thought it was a good game, myself. Fast, driven, battling, almost playoffs-y. We fans, both mad and neutral, have been witnessing a team missing a certain je ne sais quois. Maybe it's the mass amount of free agents coming up who are trying too hard, or that bizarro preseason/training camp squish that didn't allow them to work out on things, or the mass amount of brainfreeze eminating from the ice to their minds. Either way, I liked what I saw tonight, except for the excruciating amount of turnovers that really killed them, but hey now Carbo has a full video selection for them to reference. And the 3rd period pretty much collapsed defensively and offensively but hand it to the Canes for a few patented dives and a neutral zone trap. Still, I ain't in the camp of the pitchforks and torches calling for the a new set of coaches or the explosion of the entire team. IT'S FUCKING NOVEMBER PEOPLE! WE AREN'T TAMPA BAY!!! AND WE DON'T MAKE OUR DECISIONS AFTER EA SPORTS NHL09 SIMULATIONS!!! At least not yet, anyway. December/January...that's when I'd get pitchforky.

All in all, this was a tale of two teams going through some similar funk and coming off eerie similar wins of a 3-2 shootout against bottom-feeder teams. Coincidence! The game was tight thanks to our voodoo master, Price, who tried to help his buddy Gorges get a goal tonight by sacrificing his stick, splintering it to a billion pieces and scattering it around the rink. Well, I think the sacrifice only worked in his favor as he faced 48 shots and only allowed two unfortunates while down and out and totally left hanging by his panicking defense who couldn't clear it or by an unfortunate turnover by a surprised Sergei Kostitsyn (who wasn't expecting that pass at all) which allowed that dastardly Sergei Samsonov get his first goal of the year. Hey, even Sammy had to score one day. Sucks it was tonight, but I'll live with that.

BONUS HIGHLIGHT #1: Eric Staal, totally annoyed to hell, hands of clay in front of Price. No confidence, no dice!

Koivu, Lang, and Kovy practiced that powerplay this morning. It only worked once, so I'm guessing we're on our way to one powerplay goal per month. The rest collapsed to its usual hectic self. Keep working on it.

BONUS HIGHLIGHT #2: Plekanec won a face off against Brind'Amour! Steve Begin won the most faceoffs that night, 83% (5/6)! Crazy!

I like Ward's new helmet. Also Ward could have potted that empty netter but freaked out and didn't try. C'mon Wardo, be a man! Actually after Price's performance, I'm happy the boys didn't give up the empty net. That would have been insulting.

BONUS HIGHLIGHT #3: Carbo threw out an extra forward before pulling Price, so he had a lineup of 4 forwards and 1 defenseman. It kind of stuttered the Canes, but not enough. Still, it was crafty.

So now they're off to Ottawa, to face a team equally pissed off as ours. Yay! And another annoying Ruutu. Yay! I like Ottawa's Ruutu better though. I don't know much about Chicago's. And maybe we'll see Higgins wake up again before he gets a "lower body injury" and is sent to Hamilton for "conditioning" while his better clone Matt D'Agostini gets some time with the big club...

Bulldogs!
Good read on my favourite little centerman, David Desharnais, and his mad skills on the ice and in the kitchen.

What's with all the shootouts?
- Wild top a Fleury-less Penguinos squad in a shootout 2-1. Yawn... Again both goalies faced the exact same number of shots in regulation. Mikko scored unassisted, but it was actually a complete fluke.
- Oy... The Battle of Florida went to a shootout and the Panthers won it 4-3 (McCabe? Two goals? And not on his own net?). I thought Smith was better at shootouts? At least, he was back in Dallas... Shots faced: Smith with 36, Vokoun with 52! What is it with the sunbelt hockey teams?
- Roloson faced 39 shots while Leclaire only face 19, but the Oilers WIN 7-2?! Wish we had that accuracy...

I'm sick and it isn't from the weather...

I'm so tired of elections and general politics that I'm really close to dumping my new condo, quitting my job, and hiding somewhere in the brush of the Northwest Territories. Or London, Ontario (assuming I can try again for that other job). And I'm not talking Canadian politics. My dad insists on leaving the TV on CNN every morning and night, even though he really just uses it to put himself to sleep. My friendly Americans, just watch the Daily Show, that's really all you need to know... And now there's word of a Provincial election that might happen. Great, just what I needed. More stomach churning worries that the PQ might be elected once more after they were booted out years ago 'cause god knows my fellow citizens for the most part have short-term memories even though our motto is "Je me souviens". (They don't even remember what that's from either). Thank god there's some hockey tomorrow.

I'm in your systems, raining on your day.
Tomorrow's forecast calls for rain, rain, snow, and rain. And I'm not talking about the Hurricanes. Well, no, they'll be here too. Hope the boys are awake, 'cause we all know how they tend to play on rainy days. Our ray of sunshine will be from Sergei's smiling face in practice pictures as he wrestles with Price (what? practicing goalie interference?) while big brother Andrei is skating around looking just fine. C'mon Doc, give the man clearance. Other than another black eye, he looks fine to me. (Which is good to see, considering he has epilepsy and god knows what head shots do to people with such conditions).

The 'Canes also just came off their own brush with the Head Shot. And I agree with their GM, the league just wants to say they care but don't give enough of a damn about it. Guess the same rule of fixing a bad intersection here applies: it takes 50 people to have their career end prematurely before they'll actually make a move. Or, maybe just Crosby. Thankfully it didn't end the career for Andrei, nor Mathieu Carle (who was just cleared and sent to the Bulldogs), and doesn't look like it'll end for rookie Brandon Sutter.

Carbo said it best, that hey in case you didn't notice, when you play hockey, the puck is usually on the ground, so you know, you're head is going to be down. He just doesn't buy that "keep your head up" crap. I'm also tired of hearing that old mantra. The league is quick to up scoring and changing rules there, but what'll happen if everyone is too concussed to do anything? Until players get some kind of suspension, they'll never learn to think about making a move on a vulnerable player. The game is fast, and accidents happen when one play goes bad, but that doesn't mean you can't think. I'll give it to Sutter, he actually had the puck, and it was just a hit gone wrong because he suddenly leaned down to play the puck forward just as Weight smacked him one. But Andrei didn't have it anymore, not for a while, and Carle was just off a simple dump in that really didn't warrant an open-ice Kronwall-y smackdown (in preseason, no doubt). It's just all stupid. (Of course I'm the first to note that no-check hockey is a fucking snorefest, I'm just asking for a little bit of brains, that's all).

Come down from Cloud 9
- Hey, like the Habs, the glaring errors on the Sabres finally caught up to them as Miller wasn't in nets to bail 'em out (nor was he being switched in). Sens HIGH-FIVE, Slugs 2. Lalime was in nets for the Slugs here. So that leaves the Minnesota Not-So-Wild as the only team that has yet to lose in regulation (6-0-1). Wee...Habs visit them Thursday...
- Detroit had to take the Kings to a shootout, 4-3. I'm intrigued by this.
- Rangers beat the...ya, it's not that hard to beat the Islanders these days, though.
- The Palin Curse didn't affect their games, but the Blues have no more goalies thanks to her. They now rely on two untested rookies that they seem to like swapping mid-game as if it were still pre-season. Not that they're facing many shots anyway.