Showing posts with label In Bob We Trust. Show all posts
Showing posts with label In Bob We Trust. Show all posts

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Habs 3, Rags 1: Go fish

Apparently there was a game on tonight.

Apparently someone forgot to tell the Rangers, though.

What do you think about that, Torts?

Yea, thought so.

Hear that? That was the sound of the many Rangers fans calling for Sather's (and probably Torts') head. Shall we knit?

So, what was good about this?
- Kept the Rangers to 11 shots for 2 periods. Really thought they ended with 11 shots, actually. Either way I don't think they cracked 20.
- The goalie doesn't need to stand on his head for once. (Actually hasn't needed to do so since that Sharks game). The defense blocks whatever doesn't miss.
- Sergei Kostitsyn WITH ANOTHER GOAL, JACQUES! You can put him on the powerplay anytime now!
- Metro has 16 goals.
- Dubinsky? Callahan? Drury? Chief? McCloud!
- Pleky is indestructible and stabbed Del Zotto in the heart by making him look silly for the empty netter.
- Anyone see Gaborik?
- Avery is still a jerk.
- Habs now nestled semi-comfy in 6th place and totally sneaking up on the Sens (who lost again).
- GIVE GAINEY CREDIT YOU SILLY HABS FANS.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Bob's your uncle

Pull my finger.

I know you were thinking about it for a long time, Bob, but that doesn't mean I gotta be happy about. In fact I'm downright depressed and angry about it. I thank you for fixing this team regardless of how underappreciated the dumbasses in this city are about everything you've done. Pierre Gauthier just isn't as funny as you are... (Yes, I know you'll still be there behind the scenes, but you won't be making the press conferences).

I'm sure they're doing cartwheels on L'Antichambre.

And if Pierre Gauthier trades Price for Paul Kariya, I'm grabbing my pitchfork.

Fuck Mondays. Castle better not be a rerun.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

You're number 1 in my heart

Duck and cover!

Despite being afraid he'd get taken away by the Wild, who were seriously considering it but opted for a defenseman from their own backyard, Habs picked a good West Island kid just like they hoped: Louis Leblanc. He's already got his own "Lou~is!Lou~is!" cheer too! Probably walked out a lot happier than noted Habs fan/supposed to be Sens' pick Nazem Kadri...who got picked by our mortal enemy, the Leafs. Poor kid!

Nelson Muntz moment of the evening
When the Kings snatched away Brayden Schenn, Brian Burke plotzed. No brothers for you!

Give the kid a hug
Nazem Kadri was obviously happy to be picked but looked noticeably hurt he was sporting a blue leaf.

Mumbling mumbler award
Tavares. Speak up, man!

Questionable humans
The Capitals squad appared to refuse to touch the food and drinks provided on their table, leaving us to wonder if they were a) robots, or b) camels.

Noticeably bored
Bruins and Blackhawks appeared to be so bored they were trading desserts.

Fuck you, Bettman
The PHOENIX Coyotes. Yea, we heard you, douchenozzle. Three cheers to the crowd for starting a HA!MIL!TON! chant.

WTF FLYERS?!
Because Danny Briere was feeling lonely in sucking up your cap space, you deal away the only player I like on your team (Luca Sbisa) and Lupul plus some picks for...PRONGER?! I guess there's the defenseman who will be waiting in the weeds to pounce on Ovie, eh Don Cherry? Watch your elbows, kids. Guess the Flyers felt they weren't violent enough.

This was the type of deal I was hoping Bob NOT to make for Vince, as in replace Sbisa with Subban and Pronger for Vince. Thank you, Bob for not doing it.

Crowd thinking Bob was trading
He was actually asking around to switch up picks because he wanted to make sure no one would steal Leblanc. They got particularily interested when he was talking with the Panthers. Hahaha, you guys are the funneh.

Just drafted, already being run out of town
What. The. Fuck. Yea, the young man believes in a good education and has opted to go to Harvard to maybe study economics while continuing his hockey studies. He's only 18, he's only 6'1", he's still growing and/or filling in the frame. WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT FROM HIM?! Unhappy they were picking Americans for years, now they finally find a local still available that they wanted and pick him, and the fans complain. Waiting around for the "big splash" that was promised, when in fact nothing happened and frankly no one promised anything other than the rumor mill at various media outlets, and fans huff and puff. On my way to the metro, a group of guys were visibly and vocally grumpy, slurring Leblanc's name, and whining about the lack of a trade for Lecavalier, saying it'll probably happen tomorrow, and how Leblanc will play 5 games and then disappear... Lucky I'm good at restraining myself from jumping people who piss me off.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

The Final Chapter...

In an almost cruel trick of nature, the sun broke through the clouds and gave way to clear skies. Battered and broken, the young Lord Price gazed up at the blinding light. An eerie silence enveloped his camp. Around him, his fellow men hobbled around on whatever strength they had left. "It's just too much," thought the young Lord while looking at his downtrodden men.

After an ambitious campaign, they had finally hit a wall. Not enough able bodies capable to carry the load, and those left healthy could barely muster a shot. The Captain, spirited as always, attempted to hold the men optimistic. "We won't go down without a fight," he said to them before the final stretch. The two young keepers tried to keep their own spirits high, but even they both knew their efforts alone couldn't save them. And although they had eagerly awaited this rendez-vous with the hated Bear Tribe of the East, they knew it wouldn't end well. "We just need to survive," is what they told each other. "No matter what happens, we'll keep our heads high."

Four nights. It felt like four years. One beating after another, losing more to injuries, and in turn slowly losing spirit. They tried hard, but it wasn't enough. The giant Chara, captain of the Bears, could stop their attack with one blow. When he didn't, his defensive shield was so great around their old keeper that it almost felt as if an invisible barrier was placed around their stronghold. Kessel, the trickster, always seemed capable of getting in at the right place at the right time, and whenever he did, he had a quality shot at the young keeper. The brutish Lucic, a sworn enemy of Lord Price's defensive leader Komisarek, was constantly in their faces. And although one of the young defensive members, Weber of Switzerland, managed to knock the brute to his knees twice, he still managed to hurt them. They were running out of power, running out of steam, and though they still held their heads high they were running out of faith.

And so they returned home, unhappy and empty handed. The city was divided on their performance between a complete vile lack of gratitude and those that still loyaly believed in them. The few that continued believing made the warriors happy, even for just a bit. But the overwhelming bile directed at them and the young keeper seemed to have outweighed this. The King, however, put his foot down and delivered a stern warning.

"Shame on you," he said of the people who spat their disrespect at the men of the sacred red, white, and blue. "Shame on you all. One day, you'll run these men out of town and will be left with nothing." The young keeper took the criticism the hardest but his men rallied to his defence, and the King echoed those sentiments. In the end they all knew the reality.

"There will be other battles, other chances," said the brilliant captain to his young keeper. With a nod, and a sigh, the keeper agreed. "Until next year," said the young Lord, trying desperately to smile. "Les Glorieux will ride again."

--------------------

Well, that's all she wrote fellow Habs fans. No, not you idiots at the Bell Centre who booed the team all night. You guys can go fuck off a bridge and die for all I care. Not satisfied with having chased Roy out of town, you're on a mission to run everyone else out and then cry about what could have been while those players have great careers elsewhere.

It was a good season despite all the injuries and adversity that marred it. I mean, we could have been like Dallas, and just NOT have made the playoffs and only managed to nab the 8th pick in the lottery. We don't have a Malkin, or a Crosby, or an Ovechkin. We don't even have a Heatley. We had no powerplay all year, though it worked some times. Every player we got over the summer who made our team better fell to devastating injuries. The final nail in the coffin was Markov...

Hockey is the type of game that can change as quickly as Kovy pivots. Hopefully the idiots tonight didn't run the entire roster out of town. I still maintain that we need the Nordiques back just to take the heat off a little.

Tomorrow is Solidarity Day. All the REAL fans should wear their sweaters or t-shirts. All the REAL fans care to support their boys and not throw towels or waterbottles. Bunch of barnyard pigs.

And now we have 5 months of speculations via talking heads. Oh how I hate the off-season... Here's to the Draft, In Bob We Trust.