Do a barrel roll!

Hey Slippy! Yea, you #47 manning the point on the powerplay. Do a fucking barrel roll.

Don't get me wrong, though. Sens deserved this win. They were the better team. But I'll rant anyway about my team.

The first time in like forever you guys are actually given proper powerplays, in plural, because the Sens were playing like a bunch of undisciplined idiots and you can't take advantage of it. Wiffed, soft passes easily picked off. Pouliot flubbing bad and turning over the puck to give them a shorthanded goal. (And don't get me wrong, that was a stunning goal... I don't even understand how that got past Price as he was way out covering the angle. It was like a curve ball, if that's even possible with a puck. Maybe it was remote controlled). And then there's Slippy... SLC has Kuba and Picard to hate on, we've got Slippy. He shoots it wide! He bullseyes a shin pad up close! He turns over the puck right by his own net and gives Price more problems than the kid needs! He never looks where he's going or where he's sending the puck! He makes me want to kick kittens!

I mean, holy shit. I've never seen a guy like him.

At least Pouliot made up for his facepalm error and scored an immediate reply.

I knew Mike Brodeur was going to be a pain in the ass anyway from what I've seen of him when he played the Bulldogs, and the Sens protected him well. Which was more than I could say for our poor goalie who will probaby have a stress induced heartattack by the time he's 25 behind this team. Why is it so difficult to exit the zone or clear the puck? Why is it so impossible to take a pass or make a pass? It's like they're stickhandling with saplings and two-by-fours. They also displayed zero intensity in what was an important game. The Sens had their full options when in our end, forcing Price to make difficult saves what with all the bouncing pucks, traffic, stick deflections and his own teammates. Markov also has to stop giving him the puck to start the breakout...

And the powerplay is becoming predictable.

Which brings me to Jacques Martin. I really don't understand his game plan anymore. The moment Habs got some momentum, he put out the crappy fourth line. I'm guessing he forgot White wasn't on the team right now. He's so concerned with matchups that he forgets about maybe, just maybe, taking advantage of something. I think I understand now why he hasn't done well in the playoffs. If Guy Boucher were on the bench for tonight's game, he'd be standing on it, screaming, and waving a pitchfork already having skewered Slippy with it. It's kind of sad that even Kirk Muller's screams for intensity go unheard or generally get ignored. I just don't understand how they have supposedly good, intense practices, yet come to the rink and suck out all the oxygen.

Oh and I don't give a damn about Guimauve's hattrick. That twerp checked out right after training camp probably when he realized the coach wasn't going to leave him chocolates on his pillow nightly. It's Mike Ribeiro 101: When you suddenly find yourself with zero protection from the Chez Nous media, you wake up and start playing else you find yourself in Europe or selling cars for H Grégoire.

Game tomorrow in New York. If the Habs lose that one, it's going to hurt. And we already knew the goalie of tonight wouldn't play tomorrow regardless of the outcome anyway so fuck off Bob Hartley.

And on that note, here, have some twitter humor:
@BruceGarrioch Leafs floating a package for Kovalchuk and Pavelic including Blake, Bozak and Schenn and Gustavsson.

By the way, you can see a Jerry Price goalie a mile away! Watching the Pens getting destroy by the Canucks, after chasing Curry away, Alex Pechurskiy has stepped in. He's a rookie Tri-City goalie and is currently holding the fort. I thought his style looked familiar and then CBC said he was called up from the Americans (and isn't being paid either). Sure enough, there he was on the roster. Even flashes the Price-like stickhandling too. Good pick for the Pens.

Is it #RefFail weekend?

Did Terry Koharski stay to officiate the Habs/Bolts game? Not saying they were the reason for a 3-1 loss, but they sure played a part in this crap.

And frankly after coming out and matching the Bruins, they decided to just mail the fucker tonight. Must be a "Hey, Price is awesome, we can go back to being lame again" thing. Forget the shot clock. When you're offense consists of frantic and franetic pressure that's so disorganized even the camera has no idea where you are, you're just firing blanks while unable to connect on a pass to save your life. And the Lightning defence actually deserves more credit than RDS was giving them. Sticks on sticks, neutralizing passes, blocking shots, being annoying... Defence I'd love the Habs to do, but that's just a dream.

And the Chez Nous boys? Lapierre 6:22 ice time, Latendresse 5:28, BENCHED IN THE 3RD! Martin has been way too patient with them. If this team is going to go somewhere, they need to wake the fuck up and contribute. I'm not even talking about scoring, I'm saying HIT SOMEONE! Where's the intensity? See Malone there? How he parks his ass in Carey's face? That's what Coach Martin wants you to do, Guimauve.

At least we got a powerplay goal (Gio again with his perfect batting average), but it was looking horrendous for a while. Then Gorges grabbed the puck away from Carey and it went in on a collision. We've seen that before...and it's annoying.

RDS' Tanguay/Lecav/St-Louis love-in made me ill. Oh guess who left with an injury? Man of glass, Tanguay! And CBC calling out Andrei Kostitsyn for that messed up icing call that wasn't even icing (no one touched the puck, he won his battle, then got wiped out...but they made him the evil one for the pileup afterwards).

Whatever. My new pet hamster, Pleky, was more enthusiastic and entertaining than tonight's suckfest. Though I'm paranoid he's going to break out of his cage as he seems to enjoy gnawing on the bars by the wheel even though he's got plenty of yummy things to chew on. He also enjoys running ON TOP of the wheel instead of running in it.

And yes, I did name his after Tomas Plekanec. There's a reason for this!

Pleky doesn't know why he's got a Guimauve and a not-very-mad-Max on his line, so he cleans his feet.

Pleky wonders what this cage thing is and how it can be cut apart.

Pleky is glad Vincent Lecav can't spear him here! But he'd love to gnaw his legs off.

Pleky on a break away!

Damn you Sliippermaki!