You disabied me, you puppy

Picture taken in Hamilton's Outback as Bob Gainey holds a meeting with Awol Kostitsyn.

I'm out of musicals, Sergei. Only you can save yourself. But if Bob Gainey can take riverside walks to chat with Kovy and set him right, you're small fry. Now, pick up your stick, get on the plane, and keep playing with Maxwell. And seriously? You're ON the fucking top line! And Maxwell finally has someone to play with!

And if you'd stop the drama, you might have been called up soon. However, right now, you're not showing them any reason why they should call you up.

Come baaaack, Sergei!

How do you solve a problem like Sergei?

Deep in the heart of Caledon, just before the start of the 2009-2010 season, the Montreal Canadiens are going through their practice drills and various buddy-buddy exercises. One of the postulants, Sergei Kostitsyn, is missing. Somewhere between town and country, Sergei expresses his regret to leave the city, for the city is alive with the sound of music. He returns to the ranch in Caledon only to find the gate locked. The next day, the Head Coach and his assistants consider what to do about him. Sergei explains that he was raised in the city with a stick in his hand and a good player ready to convert his feeds, but apologizes for wandering the road without permission. Head Coach joins him in song, letting him know a few of his favourite things, but later he tells Sergei that he should perhaps spend some time in Steel Town to help him decide whether he is ready for the pro life of hockey. The Hamilton Bulldogs could always use a player of his skill, and he will act as theirs until further notice.

HOWEVER the story ends here because the lady didn't report and is currently suspended without pay. Colour me disappointed.

But something seems weird if you excuse me for a moment as I take a trip down interview lane.

"I disagree with the statement that KHL can catch up and take the lead against the NHL in the nearest future. If it ever happens it is a matter of not few years. Also, it's too early for me to talk about "zeroes" in the contract. I'm still young, will get mine when it's due. By the way, rumor that Ak Bars wanted to sign Andrei was not true. The rumor circulated all over the internet, but not a single phone call was made to my brother. Again, I don't know my brother's intentions, but as for me, I do not even plan on returning to Europe in the foreseeable future." (Read more here).

"I am still very young, and I am not even thinking about it. I want to play in the NHL. I am not thinking [about the money], I am still young, I am not 35 like Jagr, or however old he is right now. Jagr played here for a long time, and he is a big-time star, and of course he was offered a lot of money in Russia and he left. But I am only 21, I have only started playing in the NHL." (And more here).

I can has contradictions?

Maybe trade him to the Red Wings, his favourite team. Then he'll see what it means to toil in the AHL forever and ever and ever...

Anyway, season starts tomorrow people. Let's kick the tires and light the fires, and get ready for a pugnacious night.

Coupe Longueuil

I think I was more surprised with the Lightning HIRING Barry Melrose as coach than the firing of Barry Melrose as coach. In like Flint! Out like....well, I see plenty of mullets around town so I don't know if they ever went out of style for sure. Or maybe just in Longueuil? Ya right. Montreal: where mullets are still apparent, even on women, and Engelbert Humperdinck plays sellout crowds.

Gotta wonder why so quickly, though. Actually, I won't wonder. They're betting on Rick Tocchet now to do better. Badump-ching! Sorry. Ah I'm sure he'll do fine. I'm going to miss the Coach-o-Meter 3000 on BMR though.

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Hamrlik says: "Tomorrow is another day." Even he knows musicals solve everything!

So the Flyers come to town, and our boys wear the Punch Line sweaters. Our hope is someone plays like the Punch Line. My hope is they just play. Halak is in nets, and I'm sure he's done breaking in those retro looking pads. Komisaurus hurt his hand punching Lucic's helmet. I think Rhino did that last year in Florida. Well, time for everyone to step in on shot-blocking! Right? I remember Gorges really stepped in when Komo got hurt (by Loooooch too) last year. Also Sergei had some upper-body soreness and missed practice... Please say he plays! Please!!! And please tell Lang to casually tip his lovely passfeeds into the net instead of swinging for a post. I just can't stomach more posts...and that was a beautiful pass. The kid looked so sad it didn't go in...

If we're down Sergei and Komo, minu Kostopoulos who's on his last day of suspension... well, we'd be looking like last years Habs team around November/December? That wasn't too bad.

In other news: Other teams get a loss of 6-1 too. That's right, your Buffaslugs! Columbus with the trap. Also the Flames lost 6-1 courtesy of the Sharks.

How do you solve a problem like Patrick Roy?

Wink.
There's speculation about raising #33 to the rafters. While no one has really confirmed it, the media is treating it like it's a done deal. Personally, though I grew up with the man in nets talking to his goalposts, I don't know if he belongs up there. On one hand I say yes. He really pushed and popularized the butterfly style which is the mainstay norm of goalies today (even though he wasn't the first to use it). He racked in the Jennings (with Hayward) and Vezinas, the Conn Smythes and brought the team to win ye olde Adams Divisions a few times. He was also the first real star of a goalie the Habs had since Dryden retired, bringing two stanley cups and bringing the team close to a few more. There are other reasons involving a rookie goalie saving the franchise, stats, playoffs elevation, etc. Of course there's also his charity work, and you can say what happens off ice really should hold no ground...right? He's only human, right? But on the other hand I say no.

Whether the blame should fall on Mario Tremblay/Ronald Corey/Rejean Houle or not, unfortunately most fans remember his "last game" in Montreal before storming off to the Nordalanche. As a goalie, yes, it's hard to get shellacked in a 12-1 loss. Goaltending is the most unique and often embarrassing position to play. But instead of breaking down, he should have held his head high and shoved it back in Tremblay's face. (Afterall Tremblay never liked the guy. Ever). And where was the team in that terrible game? Of course, ask anyone and his character will come up. He's no Carey Price or Cristobal Huet, who would suck up a 6-1 loss together and just continue on to try and do better the next game. Roy was indeed a hot head with a rather large ego, but you could probably say that for most athletes in such a competitive sport. This is, after all, the guy who led Team Canada to a bronze medal loss while refusing to let backup Martin Brodeur play.

But then there's the middle ground. Should the Canadiens let bygones be bygones and raise the number, it would be the definite olive branch to mend those past wounds held not only over the organization but the fans. Yes his actions brought shame to the Tricolore, and the recent events involving his son don't really help...but ask any kid growing up from the 80s and they'll tell you Patrick Roy was the best there was, and not just as a player. Besides, no one appears to dare to wear his number since he left, as if it were retired behind the scenes. (Yea yea, the Avs already retired it). May as well make it official.

So what do you do? If anyone can solve this, it could be mr. reasonable Bob Gainey (though I've no idea who decides what number to retire). But with the ghosts of historical greats like Bill Durnan or Toe Blake seeking a number raise, particularily in the Centennial year, does Roy warrant it this year? Maybe CBC could one-up the BBC and make a new reality show on it. Oh, right, they only worry about the Leafs.