Habs 3, Pens 2: Whine and cheese

Whilst out celebrating my mom's 60th birthday, Habs were taking on the Penguins. Or, as I like to call it, PK Subban annoying Sidney Crosby forever.

- It's Pacioretty Week! Two more goals!
- Eller and Galchenyuk are being wasted by Prust. Sure Prust is a great energy guy, but he's not Gallagher. The least you could do is rotate a double shift of Gallagher, Pacioretty, and Bournival.
- When the Penguins waste opportunities early (ie. gifted powerplays) they turn into the whiniest whinebags ever and frustrate themselves into a hole.
- Fleuuuuuuryyyyyyyy.
- Did you know D'Agostini is a Penguin? I just remembered.
- Also just remembered Chocula is an assistant coach. That's pretty funny, considering what happened in 2010...
- Carey Price > Fleury
- By like a hundred thousand miles. And kilometers.
- Pleky beating Crosby on the faceoff matchup. All. Night. Long.
- Gionta pissing Crosby off. All. Night. Long.
- Ya I can't even blame Fleury for that 2nd Pacioretty goal. That release was ridiculous.
- You know what happens when you've got 3 minutes left in a game, and you were doing so well matching up lines and then you THROW OUT BOUILLON-DIAZ whilst Malkin-Neal are on the ice? You get two pylons and a goal against.
- So if PK is "too risky" for Team Canada, what the fuck is Letang?
- Meanwhile Team Russia is looking for some loophole to put Subban on their team.
- Not really, but they should.

I remember hearing how Habs will drop both these games on the radio. Please keep saying that so the opposite will happen, thanks.

 Peter Budaj, stealing yer stick

Habs 4, Pens 5 (SO): In dire times...

...we look at the bright side.

They scored 4 goals.

Unfortunately, "One More Beer" Budaj was in nets scaring the shit out of me every time the puck went near him. There's only so much dumb luck one can bank on.

They scored a powerplay goal.

Unfortunately, a complete full team brain fart had them give up a shorthanded goal to Dustin Jeffrey of all people. Blame PK all you want, what the fuck were the rest of the guys doing on the one side of the rink?

Wait, I was supposed to look at the bright side!

Uh...they got a point. McGuire said getting at least a loser point was important. For whatever that's worth.

Adorable and fluffy, but big assholes on the ice.

Habs 2, Pens 5: Silver platter

One game, two points, best served cold.

Isn't that cute? Fleury did the Buffalo Stance after 20 saves and only really working for 10 minutes. Obviously the pose gets praise 'cause he did it. Imitation is the most sincerest form of flattery, but I thought he would be more than capable to get his own damn pose. The League needs more goalie posing! But originality is key. He should also send a thank you card to the Habs and a special extra thank you to Jaro Spacek for the 4 powerplay goals cushion. Brutal penalty kill, brutal penalties, brutal pylons and obviously fatigued. That's what happens when you're behind the play, reaching, and constantly defending...

But for 6 minutes and 30 seconds in the second period, there was a non-stop action sequence with back-and-forth hockey, odd-man rushes (mostly in Price's direction), and just a whole lot of FUN! The guys actually looked awake for the first time all game. I could see Jacques Martin's face flush as the sequence went on. Then, obviously, diarrhea: too many men on the ice.

The moment was dead.

Spacek was on the ice, again, killing a penalty with 10 seconds left.

Spacek, in the corner behind his net, attempts a crap clear TO THE FUCKING SLOT. Perfect pass to Jordan Staal for his first of the year. I swear I saw the #8 on that Habs sweater. The game died right there for the Habs. Jaro Spacek gets the Mike Komisarek Award for the night.

Coach gets the dunce cap because Jaro Spacek and his buddy Hamr were out there on the PK that gave up FOUR GOALS. They did not help, they made everything worse.

Benoit Pouliot went from yay to nay in the span of a day. Three stupid penalties that cost the team (and him a goal even if it was a weak call, you can't poke your stick towards players hands and expect otherwise). Seriously, is there a player more infuriating than Benoit Pouliot?

Lost in the kerfuffle, Mighty Mite David Desharnais scored his first NHL goal. I don't think I have ever seen a man so happy in my life. Nintendo Sixty Four territory. A perfect tip-in on a Subban shot. It was like I was watching the Bulldogs for a few minutes. The smallest man on the ice (yes, he's smaller than Gionta). His head is barely above the boards. His height is definitely listed "on skates". Buffalo Stance that one, Fleury.