Habs 5, Canucks 2: Max scores a hat trick, is a bum

I'm kidding.

But if Pacioretty knew how to penalty shoot, he would have gotten FIVE goals last night. FIVE. I don't think anyone would have faulted him to go full Thornton on that.

As far as hat tricks go, probably his lamest. But we still love him.

Oh and another 42 saves from Price. Ho hum.

How I see Carey Price play behind this D.

One more til Sochi. Can Ryan White make it 3 in a row in getting a game star? I am happy to see Weise provide us with a proper fourth line. Unfortunately, Bournival is now hurt. SONUVABITCH!

Habs 3, Whalercanes 0: That's nice, now do it again.

Amazerful.

Lars Eller back at center? Check. His line produces the first goal.

Bournival freed from 4th line purgatory to play wing with Plekanec and Gionta in a speed game? Check. And FINALLY.

PK Subban dislodged from the Douglas Murray barge? Check.

Only 8 minutes for Daniel Briere? Check.

Shortest amount of minutes for Murray? Check

No Dump and Chase, but actually carrying of the puck? Check.

And yet Price still had to do the circus routine. Many stupid turnovers, too many more odd-man rushes, wide open slot, Murray tipping pucks into him, outshot by a rather large margin...

Oh and the powerplay was stinky. Dump and Chase isn't something you want to see, but when they're stacking up at the blueline and not letting you carry the puck in, THAT'S when you need some dump and chase. Flip it over them and attack with speed you lazy bums.

You might want a proper fourth line because Moen floating around with Parros (useless) and Briere (uselesser) is absolutely a waste of bodies.

Nice it was a shutout. However they owe Price at least 5 more of these...

Habs 2, Hawks 1 (OT): I love you

Or Markov 2, Hawks 1.

No other way this game should have ended than in overtime. Great game. Reason why I HATE the fact the Hawks only come to town once a year. Also can you imagine how awesome hockey would be if we didn't have to waste our time playing annoying expansion teams? Those were the days. Long long before I was born, of course. But I can only imagine how nice it was to have the best play the best.

And I feel people should apologize to Parros.

I really didn't care he was in the line up, honestly. Some people did. I only hoped he'd be managed, and you're at HOME. So with last change I hoped if anything his minutes and matchups will be properly monitored. I mean if he happened to be on the ice with Hossa going full steam towards out net, forget it. But he wasn't so it was safe. I joked he was playing for shits and giggles. And then in the first period he gave the Habs their first shot on net. Would you believe me if I told you it was a Cammalleri-type shot on bended-knee? Because it was.

And again we saw Plekanec shut down a major star player, minus the one error by Gorges who got stuck between two plays while PK flew in to help and Gionta couldn't handle Hossa for the goal. But other than that, his line's work tonight should be archived to the museum for how to shut down and play ridiculous. OT was fantastic too.

Hey! Emelin was back to destroying players too!

Lars Eller was playing all night with a huge grin on his face. Even with the ridiculous shot saved by Crow's hail mary.

When they skate, it's fun! Let's hope this wakes them up out of whatever cocoon they've shoved themselves into.

Habs 2, Bolts 1 (SO): Carey Price

Thank you very much.

You know, I sometimes wish the NHL would adopt IIHF point system so players wouldn't dick around until they get the loser point and then dick around more in OT so they could take turns on the goalie in the crapshoot.

Would it maybe give players and teams more urgency to win in regulation?

(Of course I hate how gold medals can be won in shootouts in the IIHF so fuck that).

There was a whole lot of nothing in this game though. Too afraid to screw up. Not enough to take a chance. Dump. Chase. Snooze button.

Lars Eller is sick in shootouts. Even Ben Bishop being large couldn't save him.

Habs 2, Bruins 1: Trumpets and all that fanfare

Allow us to bask in this glow...

First in the Atlantic, baby!

Exhausted? Check. Carey Price? Check. Bruins? Teehee. Got Pleks? Hell yes.

And they scored those goals after I noted how gassed they looked, figuring they won't score a single goal tonight. Reverse psychology!

Habs 3, Devilzz 2: Old men bested by young men

HEAAAAAA!

Hell yes. The Devils and their old farts can get their discount trip back to New Jersey for the rematch in thist first of a home-and-home series. Speaking of which, who the fuck thought "A home-and-home series with the Devils is JUST what we need! Let's pick the speedy Habs team to do it too!"

Kill me.

- PK Subban had more saves than Brodeur.
- Carey Price had more saves than Brodeur. Haha Habs were outshot 22-9 by the end of the 2nd. And were up 2-1.
- Obligatory goal by Bernier. Seems to remind himself he's a hockey player when he plays here. Still not enough to warrant that 3rd star though. Wondering if he has family in the media or they've promised him a job later..
- Obligatory goal by Ryder. Because of course.
- Jagr has big feet.
- Bourque LIVES!
- What is with the slide whistle? Did Molson hire a clown to provide musical entertainment?
- Remember folks, Galchenyuk could technically join the USA WJC team. But won't, obviously.

Also this.

- Needed more yakety sax.
- I found video of Desharnais forchecking the Devils with great puck pursuit.

- PK Subban and Carey Price combine like Voltron into Subbrice, Ultimate Goaltender!
- Moen crunched Fayne and it was loud. And crunchy.
- Zidlicky tried to take out Desharnais knees. The refs ignored it.
- This game was so dull even the puck was refusing to join in.
- Pacioretty fist pump celebration, still being reviewed by Toronto.
- Plekanec and Eller went all beast mode preventing Brodeur from going to the bench.
- Regardless of the win, the broadside of the barn is totally safe. (Practice those empty net shots or give it to Price dammit).

Oh my god we have to deal with these fuckers again? At least that takes care of two Devils game.

Habs 4, Leafs 2: CBC tears

You know the Habs had a good night when CBC is a steaming pile of whinebags who can't hide their Leaf blankies fast enough. And once Sportsnet takes over it's will only get worse!

- Remember kids! When you score a kick ass shorthanded goal, and it's your second of the night, don't you dare sheath your stick like a sword! You might motivate the team you're beating 4-0 to play better for a whole 80 seconds!
- Seriously, they can't pull the plug off HNIC fast enough. My biggest problem is TVA taking most of it over from RDS. Lord help us.
- Can we talk about how Pacioretty had 5 shots on net in the first 5 minutes? At one point he had outshot the Leafs on his own. And outscored.
- Price had an assist on that Pacioretty goal. Already better than Bouillon.
- You may want to read the rulebook if you don't understand why that Leaf goal was disallowed. JVR went into the crease on his own and didn't leave. He was in the way. It's rare you'll find a ref that actually understands this. So shut the fuck up, Carlyle.
- PK hit Orr. Orr revenge hit PK. Parros challenged him. Orr said no. Parros then took the puck up the ice for a scoring chance? Yea that happened.
- PK Subban. Put that in your Team Canada pipe and smoke it.
- Obviously he's just too good for the Olympics. The Russians are trying to find a way to "borrow" him.
- Plekanec cross checked Kadri and we all nodded in approval.
-Then Plekanec scored a goal, and we all nodded in approval.
- I still got major feels over that shorthanded Pacioretty goal.
 

- JVR's goal was the reason why Philly traded him. Way too much awesome skill for them. Which means the Leafs will probably trade him again.
- Obligatory Mason Raymond goal. Yawn.
- CBC couldn't be anymore Leaf blue than their entire studio is GLOWLING LEAF BLUE.
- Galchenyuk was benched for the entire 3rd period. No problem. He's a coach kid. He understands that penalty was bad.
- Carey Price save dot gif. All of them. Especially that one. And that one. Ohhh that one was nice too.
- Yea he's so good he doesn't even get a star anymore. But he'll probably get the Molson Cup anyway.
- If there's only one thing these guys need to work on it's scoring on an empty net.
- Bernier now 0-3-0 vs the Habs, I think. Regardless of whatever team he's on.

Pacioretty had TEN shots on net. PK had 6 shots. CBC cried about powerplays in Habs favour, even though Leafs had twice as many but SHHH they believe if they suck up even more to the Leafs, Sportsnet will rehire them. All in all, great night for the Habs.

And a GREAT birthday for Toaster!

Habs 2, Stars 1: Primodial

Of course he meant "primordial".

Too be honest I thought this would be a loss. Mostly because Lehtonen tends to give this team fits regardless of who's on staff. And Jamie Benn is awesome. Then I remembered Lindy Ruff is coach. The Dallas Stars are now the Buffalo Sabres with less douchebags.

- All we are saying is give Douglas Murray a chance!
- And so far so good. Six hits. Never mind his bumping his own nose on the glass or the weaksauce interference penalty they call him for.
- Pretty sure after he hits someone he rolls up his sleeve and makes another mark.
- They say this Crankshaft is a bad mother. Shut your mouth! ♪
- I didn't notice but was Erik Cole or Tyler Seguin playing?
- I'm sorry. People will say Desharnais did well tonight. He did and didn't. So status quo. I saw him pass the puck badly, behind both his linemates, get the lucky bounce back to the D who sent it to the net where Leblanc and Bourque were crashing and banging and making it count.
- Alex Chiasson brought 52 people to watch him. And Price robbed him of his baseball goal.
- Can you please stop with the crap about Eakin's goal? A hard sneaky snap shot hiding behind PK wired to the goal with everyone frozen in time is not a banana and it pisses me off whenever a goal goes in the fucking trolls come out of their caves (who were apparently quiet for 40 minutes). Also apparently it negates all the incredible work Price and the D did holding the Stars off.
- But it's totally cool when Pleky does it right. Get over yourselves. Habs were still winning.
- Also considering the Stars should have scored about 3 goals right before that when they held the zone for what seemed like 5 minutes with poor Douglas Murray huffing and puffing around...
- But the Habs also should have had at least 300 wide open empty net goals. Shit happens.
- Speaking of empty nets... You could probably pull your goalie with 5 minutes left and not worry with these guys.
- Diaz scored by shooting the puck wide. Bounced off Robidas.
- Actually they ended up crediting it to Bournival, since it bounced off him too.
- He then continued shooting the puck wide. Hilarious.
- One of these days someone not named Blunden will finish a PK Subban dipsy doodle rush...
- Erik Cole did not troll us.
- GUYS. GALCHENYUK!
- Also PLEKANEC. LORD OF TWO WAY HOCKEY.
- I'm still laughing at that puck sitting in the crease for like a full minute with everyone looking at it before Bouillon fired it out of the zone.
- Alex Chiasson got the RDS home town discount 3rd star and did not wave to the 52 people who came to see him.

Gopher State they go. Go for it. Ok I'll stop.

Habs 4, Ducks 1: Koivu

This is all we need here.

A fitting tribute by the fans, and a kind gesture by Boudreau to put him out on the ice for the final shift (where he lined up by the new number 11, Gallagher). Chants of "SAKU! SAKU! SAKU!" echoed around the rink. L'Antichambre we gracious enough to put their bias aside and nominate him the third star of the game so the fans could properly send him off with another ovation and a solo skate.

As for the rest of the game, total team effort.

- Everything  they did wrong against the Oilers they did right tonight.
- Early 2-0 lead made us all dubious regardless.
- Plekanec was a beast all game.
- Corey Perry had his usual shit fit and attempted to take out PK.
- Gionta takes a high stick to the face and no one argued it was because he was short. An actual 5-on-3! Proceeded to take 4 swings at the net. Fourth one was a goal.
- Can you believe Chris Lee called a better game than the shitshow we saw for the two previous games?
- The only real blemish was the terrible attempt by Diaz on a 2-on-1. Markov and PK need to help him with that... He's just really bad at it.
- When was the last time a Maroon scored on the Habs? In the 1930s?
- Bourque accepting a stretch pass by PK for what seems like the 3rd game in a row now.
- But it was his backhand that finally worked.
- I find Hiller really not as good as he used to be...
- Things must be good when they're winning 4-1 like they were before.
- Still gave up over 30 shots though.
- Bouncy shots too.
- SAKU! SAKU! SAKU!

Seriously. All the feels.

Habs 5, Lumbus 3: It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's....

Tomas Plekanec, shot out of the Lumbus cannon and saved the game with little over a minute left! All you idiots who want to trade him for whatever can kindly come here and get bitten by my dog. (He's got sharp little teeth).

- All day I heard about the "return home game let down". Honestly I was more concerned with the team getting shutout, since that usually happens after Price gets a shutout. It's like they get more complacent than usual.
- Instead, Bourque was as pale and translucent as a ghost with the flu, used it to cherry pick a super stretch passed by PK and scored a goal early!
- Seriously, someone cough on all his things. He plays so much better when sick.
- Imagine your first goal was Subban spin to Markov for a one-timer past the last Vezina winner? Happy goal day, Bournival!
- The local refs were in town. Naturally they had to put on a show!
- PK threw a perfect hit. Ref calls him for an elbow. Apparently the ref has his own elbow up his ass.
- Habs looked pissed over that call. So they scored shorthanded.
- Good thing they did because they fucked around on the penalty kill right after and gave up a goal.
- Boone Jenner was supposed to do these things, guys.
- Our faceoffs were horrendous. But this isn't news.
- I'd like Briere to take that torch the Habs graciously handed to him and use it to light a fire under his ass. EVEN GOMEZ IS DOING BETTER.
- Naturally with Patches on the mend with a strained hammy, RDS thinks Habs should bring in Simon Gagne. Because one useless old injury prone Chez Nous ex-Flyer wasn't enough eh?
- Wisniewski looks weird without a full face cage. But I give it time.
- Ever since they removed Eller from the Gallys to "jump start" other guys, he's looked out of sorts. You have officially fucked with his mojo!
- Regardless, I can watch Eller and the Gallys with Markov and Subban run a power play all night, even if they don't score. Which is also why I can't stand it when Desharnais and Briere are out there first more often than not instead...
- Pretty sure Johansen's shot broke the sound barrier.
- Carey Price is jumping hurdles! Send him to Rio!
- Considering all the abuse Gallagher takes, he's going to have to end up dead before these idiots call a penalty.
- There was a sequence where Lumbus shot from the point wide on purpose for a tip-in goal. Fortunately for us, Price went all Mentalist on the play and was in position before the guy could even get the puck.
- With a minute left and the game tied at 3, Pleky walked over the blue line and shot right through the defenceman. Bob never saw it coming.
- Second shorthanded goal of the game into an empty net. I'm glad you guys are over your allergy to them.
- Dubinsky was Hulking out after the game, throwing his equipment into his bag. No gatorade coolers were harmed though.
- Honestly what do you have to be angry about? The fucking refs basically gift wrapped this game for you and the Habs getting sloppy after Markov's goal helped them along...
- Diaz's ass saved the game blocking a shot into a yawning cage.

The greatest graying hair show on Earth!

Good news folks! Pacioretty is only out 3-ish weeks (give or take). Strained hamstring just like I thought it was.

Habs 3, Jets 0: The Price is Right, Bitches!

 While TSN is still popping champagne over the Leafs easy win against a Wild team that sucks/played yesterday/played their shitty 3rd string rookie goalie, Habs were having fun in Winnipeg. Well about as much fun one can have in Winnipeg. Which means BEATING THE JETS.

- J! E ! T! S! JETS! JETS! JETS!
- All the same to me.
- Prust opens the scoring, Desharnais had a fantastic view of it, RDS popped the champagne. Brolieu helped out!
- I'm reasonable. Desharnais did well tonight. Well enough.
- PK Subban scored another goal for Team Canada. Unless they really do want Hamhuis to score for the other team.
- Pacioretty got tangled up with two players in the slot and did the splits. Didn't return.
- Fuck you hockey gods.
- I figured once the Habs were up 2-0 the Jets would start a fight. Didn't think Tangradi would go with Ryan White though. Didn't last too long. Actually looked more like a glomp than a fight. (Lucky for Tangradi).
- Habs missed so many gifted empty nets...
- Jets pretty much took over the rest of the game, but Price was there.
- Price was so huge he willed the puck off Andrew Ladd's stick and off harmlessly to the corner WITH HIS MIND!
- Price also one-upped on Tuukka and blockerd some guy who was skating right for him. Tim Peel was unimpressed.
- Tim Peel is a dumbo.
- Diaz's best game ever. I'm serious.
- Byfuglien was probably the most invisible giant man ever tonight.
- PK Subban and Brolieu went the whole length of the ice a few times. I'm in love, guys.
- PK was probably the only other awesome part of this game after Price. A 2-on-1? No problem.
- TSN probably still thinks Suckmeester would fit better on Team Canada. PK would make us look too good.
- I wanted the Habs to draft Trouba but he was gone by then. Imagine PK, Brolieu, and Trouba on one team?
- Tim Peel hates Evander Kane more than PK Subban.
- Blake Wheeler delivered a headshot on Plekanec. Doubt he'll get a call.
- Just as I was yelling at how annoying and useless Briere has been, and was fucking around with the puck, turnovers and all, he finally gets out and hits the empty net.
- How about you score on a goalie now, Briere? I'm not asking much. I'm just asking more than one play a game and less killing of plays...

Successful roadtrip West! Minus the injury to Pacioretty... That could hurt if it's bad.

Habs 4, Canucks 1: This recap slipped right through Luongo as well

This game. Words cannot describe it. So we'll throw them on bullet points!

- For the Habs, it was all Price and anything once over the Canucks blue line. Having the Sedins vs Diaz all night was enough to make me grey.
- Defensive zone was such a clusterfuck. Calmed down incredibly in the 3rd though.
- Yup. Markov paired with PK is the way it should be. He's so much quicker, so much at ease. He looks younger! Almost like he doesn't have to worry so much about his partner (Diaz). Who knew! (RE: Everyone).
- But of course we should remember that according to PJ Stock, Markov hates PK.
- Garrison had 10 shots out of the 40 the Canucks threw at Price. And by shots I mean cannonballs.
- There was a Carey Price cheering section, a Josh Gorges cheering section (his grandma!) and a Brendan Gallagher cheering section (his family minus his busy playing hockey little brother).
- The CAREY!CAREY!CAREY! were louder than the LOUUUUU.
- Dan Hamhuis was our best player.

Oops.

- Lars Eller is so good he doesn't even need to be on the ice to score.
- Though according to PJ Stock, Lars Eller turned over the puck on a Diaz crappy outlet pass because of that playoff hit. It must hurt for PJ to think.
- Therrien's reaction to Pacioretty getting a penalty shot was the best. I don't think I ever saw him that giddy.
- Meanwhile, the camera would focus directly on Torts every time something shitty happened to the Canucks. Same old "oy vey" look every time.
- On that penalty shot, Pacioretty did a good move, Luongo lucked out and had the puck bounce off his stick and away.
- Price too had the puck bounce off his stick. Shot was so hard his stick went flying out of his hands.
- Unfortunately it didn't maim Kesler, who's ass was directly in Price's nose all night.
- I can watch Tinordi toss Kesler out of Price's crease all night though.
- Richardson was tonight's recipient of the PK Subban Butt Check.
- Complaints about the lack of secondary scoring for the Canucks? Well, maybe you shouldn't have traded Hodgson for Kassian.
- Kassian was also extra invisible.
- And ugly.
- The Canucks were so far apparently perfect on the penalty kill. Went 1-for 3 tonight.
- Pacioretty's deflection walked through Luongo and Plekanec's lovely finish to a perfect tic-tac-toe play between Markov and Subban.
- Josh Gorges scored.
- I repeat Josh Gorges scored.
- Clean shot, no deflection, right over Luongo's shoulder for some tasty cakes.
- Luongo was pissed.
- Galchenyuk went off on a breakaway and got tripped by a Sedin twin who immediately bitched about it. The king of flailing his arms while falling on his ass was bitching about a clear penalty.
- As much as I'm happy how the Habs have played in Vancouver since that embarrassing suck fest a few years ago, I just can't stand watching the Crapnucks. Whiny bitches.
- Chris Higgins still shoots wide.
- I was hoping Vancouver would be what awakens Desharnais. The body is cold.
- He had some flashes but was still stone cold.
- Briere may as well not be on this team, honestly.
- Ryan White appeared to be our lead faceoff guy. Seemed like he was winning them all.
- Plekanec appears shocked to be playing between two really good hockey players. Every time Galchenyuk sends him a pass, the skill freaks him out.
- Eller should be double-shifted so he can play again with those kids...
- It's almost 2am and NHL's website still has the Leafs-Oilers pond hockey game up as their lead story. Doesn't even have the Habs game in the rotation either. Who needs you.

 If this team wins 4-1 every time they win, I'm good with that.

Habs 4, Flyers 1: Da Da Da

Continue kneeling before Lars. He has like 5 points in 2 games now.

Meanwhile Briere has a shitload of nothing and took two annoyingly stupid penalties tonight. Did I mention Gomez even scored his first (and probably only) goal already? Help us! Save us!

The Flyers are morons at hockey and spend all their time taking stupid penalties. And goaltending is the least of their problems right now. However, if you want Briere back, you can have him.

Tonight's shutout buster was brought to you by Frankie Bubbles being completely useless on the penalty kill, losing the puck and ending up on his belly.

Bournival had the mother of all blocks, just as I was bitching they left that far point man wide open. Merci!

Gorges cleared the puck just as Couturier was coming out of the box and broke the inside glass as the door opened. It must be made of that movie trick glass because I don''t think Gorges can shoot that hard...

Also, PK Subban shot the puck INTO the pocket on the side of the net. That alone should give you 5 points bonus. Skillz.

First win of the season smells good. Going West now.

Tonight's game song.

Habs 3, Senaturds 1: For Eller

It made me happy to see them win this game in the manner they did. Hard fought, shot blocking, sacrifice and heart, the way they didn't play the night before. It does not alleviate what happened to Eller. Two games for Gryba is fine and dandy, but Eller is still gone. The feeling made worse by the onslaught of stupidity from the hockey world who just a day earlier were out with the pitchforks after Ference for his usual headshot to Grabovski. Not to mention those attempting to deflect to the "where's the outrage over what Brown did/missed" crap. You know what? How about you ask the Blues fan to fuel the outrage. We'll take care of our own, thanks.

Also all those players did not fall face first unconscious into a pool of their own blood. So shut the fuck up.

And the Habs lost more bodies. As we figured, Gionta was injured. Pacioretty got injured. Tonight Bourque smacked into Armstrong and got up slowly, blinking. It's bad enough to lose all those top players, taking each other out is not what we need.

But then Ryan White went into BAMF mode and kicked everyone's ass. Oh and some crap goalie no one likes was out of his mind. Who needs teeth, eh?

I'm gonna just leave this here, you bug-eyed fat walrus.

Next home game: Ottawa. See you Sunday, you whiny bitches.

Habs 4, Jets 2: Crash, burn, etc

Oh Winnipeg Threshers. So close, yet so far.

Thanks to Bubbles being a shit defenceman you got two goals, and some hope, despite Price playing out of his mind. And then the Rangers and Senators won. You were eliminated by the time the 2nd period ended.

I will miss you, especially when you get tossed from the WORST division in the League to one of the best. But right now, too bad so sad. You were first in your shit division and failed to hang on to it. Claude Noel will now be curt with more reporters and probably get replaced this summer. (Maybe). Habs needed this, secured home ice, and can now played the Bulldogs on Saturday to laugh in HNIC's face. (Maybe). (Well, Markov better NOT play).

Tinordi stays. If we can just find a replacement for Frankie Bubbles......

By the way, thanks to that twat Rihanna, looks like the playoffs start Tuesday.

Habs 3, Bolts 2: Hey ugly

It really didn't have to be that difficult. Honestly. But why Galchenyuk gets a pitiful 8 minutes of ice time despite being on fucking fire I have no idea. And wouldn't you know it? Remove Patches from Desharnais and put him with Pleky and he still produces! SHOCKING.

Except for that powerplay. Holy face of palming, coaching staff. The Lightning were literally giving you this game, and you throw out the same unproducing lines you broke up? Does that make any sense? It was a miracle Gionta managed to get that goal with 40-something seconds left in the 3rd. On the 6th powerplay attempt.

Never mind how many breakaways they allowed Stamkos have while on the powerplay.

And the D-zone is still a rather wonky. Whenever Frankie Bou--who I will forever call Bubbles from now on--was just atrocious. And yet, he was out there every time I looked. Price was throwing up the flippers and doing everything possible to keep the puck out and there's Bubbles getting outworked by Pouliot of all people, made worse by watching Markov not cover Lecavalier for his goal. Yep. Markov was equally brutal. You can even fancy it up to brütal.

Other guys who needed this:
- Gionta with the two goals, including the winner.
- Weber smells playoffs. He always plays good in those.
- Price de Nice.
- Price's goalposts responded well to the beating he gave them in yesterday's game.
- Gallager/Eller/Galchenyuk were doing their job but now got to play together. Keep them like this please? Better yet, give them more ice time and powerplay time?

The empty net is still a mystery. What a fucker.

Habs 0, Pens 1: 5 millimeters

See that box?

In there holds all the offense from the Habs.

The lines have gone dry and the stubborn coach will probably wait another 10 games before he moves Gallagher onto Eller's line with Galchenyuk, and remove the Armstrong fifth wheel from there down to the 4th line. And  yes, time to split up Pacioretty and Desharnais.

Meanwhile Price did all he could and Jeff Halpern really was a great waiver pick up. One bad linechange and Crosby got 5 millimeters that counted while Ryder rang a symphony of posts. And no, Fleury/Vokoun stole nothing tonight. The bombardment of weaksauce shots were hardly dangerous. The broadside of the barn was more than safe.

By the way, Gionta didn't even touch Fleury. He didn't even touch Kennedy for that matter. So shut your fucking mouth and go blame your own player Cooke, you fucking moron.

However, I throw caution to the Penguins. You're peaking early. No guarantee you'll continue winning like this in the playoffs. I'd rather the Habs take their slump now then in May.

Habs 2, Devils 1: The answer

And 42 is Tinordi.

Welcome to the NHL, Jarred Tin Man Tinordi.

The delicious irony of our highly touted defensive defenceman getting on the score sheet with a heads up assist on the game winning goal by intercepting a clear and getting the puck on net where Plekanec tipped it in.

Ended the night with the 1 assist, a +2, and a few seconds shy of 15 minutes. Also stood up for the Captain when Clarkson decided to slash him after the whistle. His gigantic father must be proud!

Exit New Jersey ASAP
- Felt like the last 5 minutes took an hour.
- I don't put much stock in the Devils playing in Philly last night to a shootout. It's practically next door.
- Only took Chris Lee the 2nd period to be Chris Lee. Still, not as bad as Tim Peel.
- CBC's Hot Air Stove claims these reality show things are the reason why a bunch of teams are doing badly (New York, Philly, Washington, Edmonton). Guess it's not bothering the Habs...considering they always have cameras in their faces.
- HOLY FUCKING SHIT ARMSTRONG SCORED A GOAL.
- Then proceeded to freak out with the puck the rest of the game.
- And parked in front of Hedberg? Mike Blunden, who's flight was cancelled out of Newfoundland yesterday and only got in close to lunch time this morning.
- Yo Habs. The diamond formation you're using on the penalty kill isn't working. And I'm waiting for you to notice this....
- And waiting...
- Guess I shouldn't hold my breath on that considering it took a fucking injury to Diaz to get PK the icetime he very much deserves...
- Who, by the way, was amazing tonight.
- That "Hey YOU SUCK" chant is bush league, Devils fans.
- Also I thought everyone agreed to ban that pedo's song from arenas.
- Lars Eller was also amazing. I don't know but every time someone says "I want to see more from him" HOW MUCH FUCKING MORE?
- Lost in all this, yea he hasn't gotten a point in a while but Galchenyuk's defensive abilities are crazy for a 19 year old who missed all of last year.
- He even dumped people out of Price's crease.
- So every time Pleky scores, half the fan base salivates at the thought of trading him? Fuck you. Pleky for life!
- Mark Tinordi is a giant giant man. I feel bad for the person sitting behind him.
- Still convinced Price can't steal a game? That was 18 saves in the 3rd period alone. You're welcome.
- By the way Habs are 2-0-0 on the Devils this year.

So, Tinordi eh... Can we keep him?

Markov interview bomb for the win.

Habs 4, Whalercanes 2: Eat crow

The trolls have slunk back under their bridges. The slight aberration in Price's play fixed by a second period of 21 shots, including a penalty shot by a fairly good player of the Staal variety. A menu of crow shall be served shortly.

And those asking why Price hasn't stolen any games for them? Voila.

Clearly it was my fault...
- Seriously. Every time I take my dog for a walk something happens. Spent the whole 2nd walking the dog.
- I wondered if they all caught an intestinal infection in the 2nd period.
- For once, I'd like it if Therrien used his damn time out when the team goes off the rails instead of waiting for his damn icing. (Hint: they ice the puck a lot...how do you  know which to call it on)?
- The bonus of 42 saves is it re-balances Price's save percentage.
- Brandon Prust also played out of his mind.
- He and Eller ended with a goal and two assists, while Galchenyuk pitched in for some solid assistance. And I'm sure Pierre McGuire is thinking up a way to backtrack on his assessment of Eller.
- Don't hold your breath on that, by the way.
- Don't hold your breath in second periods with the Habs either.
- But Eller's goal was fantastic. He just came out of nowhere, backdoor. Usually WE are the victims of those.
- Josh Gorges, POWER FORWARD. No really.
- Did you see Emelin's spin-o-rama on the first goal?
- Shut up, Eric Staal.
- You too, Skinner.
- You know, considering Marc Staal's eye ate a puck the other night, you'd think the Staals would stop the macho crap and put on visors? Still visor-less.
- Then again, I bet Pronger would still growl something about cold dead hands and visors or whatever. Dude can't even play with his kids without some light or noise problems affecting him.
- PK Subban has 6 goals and 15 points in 18 games, including tonight's BOMB on the powerplay. And apparently Gaston Therrien thinks he should do more offensively. Also played 27 minutes.
- Could stop turning the puck over in front of your net, please? Especially while on a power play.
- I wish everyone would hound the puck the way Gallagher does. Pin him to the boards, he'll still go through you for the puck.
- The Hurricanes stole the HONK!HONK!HONK! LET'S GO CANES! from the Caps.
- I feel really bad for Weber. He finally gets to play, his play is rather odorous to say the least (that penalty shot call was weaaaaaaaaaaaaaak though), and then ends up injured. Gee I wonde why this happened? Maybe because he's been siting forever!
- Ryder was benched in the third. This is why they won. (Well, it helped).

42 saves, bitches. The answer to life, the universe, and everything.

Except a game star, apparently.

Habs 3, Rangers 1: No puck for you

I guess the Habs are a good team. I mean for one, they didn't shit the bed like they normally do at MSG on the tail end of a back-to-back game.

Naturally you could just watch the game on fast-forward for the best effect. I don't have that fancy PVR stuff so I get to watch it in real-time. Sure, it was no classic. But it was a win, with two points, while the Leaf lost, and the Habs are--as of now--first in the conference.

Call it a boring road game. A neutral clogger. Call it "bad" all you want. The game actually got Torts to construct a full sentence in his post-game press conference so it couldn't have been THAT terrible.

I can honestly say I find the Rangers kind of boring. All they do is shot block you to death... It's like Jacques Martin hockey with a team you know could actually pot a few goals but won't 'cause their coach told them to shot block forever. Besides, I thought they were supposed to win the Stanley Cup.

Sometimes you have to win boring.
- Hey! Third game in a row Habs were the better faceoff team. Clearly the Russian meteor had an effect world-wide.
- I mean CLEARLY the Habs waited for their chances and gave little to the Rangers, which is why the Habs got only 17 shots while they gave up 25.
- Because clearly the Rangers didn't take advantage of Cole and DD shitting the bed after a delayed penalty where everyone but Price stopped playing.
- I guess it's ok that Cole and DD made up for the shits by helping create Pacioretty's first real goal of the year. And I could hear the Official Pacioretty Cheering section under the empty din of MSG.
- WHO LIKES ICING?
- I prefer my icing on cupcakes.
- Yesterday, Pleky got Cam Ward in the head. Tonight PK rocketed Lundqvist.
- Later, Pleky and PK combined into a goalie.
- Galchellerusty combined for the best 3-on-1 practice drill. Galchy get the goal and Eller asploded into a giant ball of laughter.
- Combined with trademark Torts facepalm.
- The Rangers were losing. Cue Rangers powerplay. Thankfully their powerplay was still worse than ours.
- Diaz decided to show us that Swiss military training with his Swiss precision on the long shot empty netter.

Random picture of Diaz and a mutant pineapple.

Wondering what tonight's media excuse will be... The refs were a non-factor. The Rangers showed up. The road-weary Habs walked in and grabbed two points off their potato field-like ice. Price proved all those bad games at MSG were either pre-renovations or just the general HABS FUCKING SUCKED EVERY BACK-TO-BACK THERE. Either way, it may just be for tonight but the Habs are first in the East.

Stick it on the fridge.