Laughingstock

Look, I'm real sick and tired of the language debate. We fans who don't give two shits what language the coach speaks but just want what's best for this team and believe Cunney deserves his shot are merely angry at the disgusting garbage spewed by the Journal de Montreal and similar media outlets. Forgive me if I'm wrong but you can't legally fire a man who's perfectly qualified for the INTERIM job as decided by his employer just because he doesn't speak French which is not a set-in-stone qualification for coaching hockey (which is in English, like the rest of the League). It's an attack on Cunney's basic human rights, for one. And I'm pretty sure he's coaching the Habs, not media.

See, we'll deal with your draconian language laws and your silly rules for which school people can send their kids too. We'll deal with your petty little signage laws, and your checklisting little Nazi squad (I ran into one OLF agent when I worked at Sports Expert...dude was totally an SS Officer in a past life). But keep your politics out of hockey. We do not need the city's opposition leader to ask the Mayor to intervene in the team's affairs with who they hire on staff. We do not need provincial politicians to aim at "scoring points" by opening their big mouths and practically pass legislation while bridges are crumbling. We do not need some hack activist to go insane on television at the "insult" Cunney was given the job, nor do we need to hear him demand poor Cunney's immediate dismissal from the team. It's beyond ridiculous at this points, and supposed professionals are acting like a bunch of irrational spoiled children. We are currently the laughingstock of the hockey world, the NHL, and the world.

Of course if you want to boycott Molson beer because you're so narrow minded that you cannot stand the fact the Habs coach isn't automatically un gars de Chez Nous or can fluently answer the same stupid question twice in two languages when media can just translated it themselves, then go ahead. That shit is nasty anyway.

And can someone tell Brian Wilde that HE can go back to Edmonton instead of telling US who were born and live here to leave if we don't like it? You start talking like that you're bringing back a whole lot of bad referendum memories, and it's crossing a line you do not cross. Also I would like you to know that Randy Cunneyworth has more head coaching experience than Kirk Muller, so his bench isn't exactly completely green here. Eight years in Rochester is a hell of a lot more than 3 months in Milwaukee. Maybe do the research next time.

Personally I wished Molson wrote his letter a little better because to me it's just basic damage control...

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My brother's choice for Habs coach: Mr. Freeze, because he speaks neither French nor English but terrible one-timers.

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I'm rather intrigued with what Cunney is trying to bring to the team, which is pretty much what we saw with the Bulldogs. The "never say die cardiac canines" as Derek Wills called them. He's trying to get them to push the pace and eliminate the passive resistance Martin ingrained into their skulls. As evidence from the last game, only 2 and a half of the lines are actually following the directives so far. This is the Nokie and Eller lines, and Erik Cole is dragging his line along to do it. The system isn't much different from before, but he got the Dogs to execute the system better. Will it be just as effective with the Habs?

One of JM's faults was his stubborn on-ice decisions. You won't see much benching with Cunney. He'll have the team live and die by its errors, and we've see it, which is fine because these players are pros and understand they will be held accountable for their actions so it'll be up to them correct it and make up for it. (Something I've heard players say Carlyle did with the Ducks). And while most fans will bitch about Darche's ice time, realize this: JM never got a feel for what was happening in game. Cunney wants to roll four lines, use the speed the players have effectively, and play hard. His is a game of trust, and if the fourth line is responding to such trust by giving him a great performances like the one in Boston where they were changing the momentum every shift it is only beneficial to the team. Of course he's still gotta get the team to RESPOND to such momentum shifts...or at least get those players that are supposed to take advantage of such momentum shifts to respond...

I guess you can say, basically, he's trying to get them to work in a manner similar to what the Rangers are doing. Will they win more games? Well, you can't lose forever right...?

Now...if he would just start playing Emelin a bit more...

Dear Bored Montreal Media,

Fuck you.

Love,
Carey Price and Andrei Markov

Soapbox: 9-11! Calling all twats!

So the hallmarked 20 games hath passed and the torches are lit. It's getting a little pitchforky by old yonder Bell Center. The natives are restless and the media has gone batshit insane. Well, more than usual. The lackluster effort in Nashville didn't help. How does one explain it all? Well, how about some True or False!

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Statement: The Habs have no prospects that are any good and the future is teh suck because all our forwards are checkers.

FALSE!
Before running off the Jacques Cartier Bridge (after climbing the suicide fence) with a sign pinned to your shoes that says you just can't take anymore and can't take anything coming, do yourself a favour and go watch a Bulldogs game or two. Then take a gander at the prospects in the pipe who are plying their trade in various schools across the USA. Guy Boucher is doing a fine job teaching these young greenhorns the finer points of pro-hockey while yelling his head off at the shitty AHL refs. Never under estimate the mighty mite of Brrrrock Trotter. PK Subban leapfrogged Yannick Weber, I'm very serious about that. And one of these days Andrew Conboy will storm onto the ice in bleu-blanc-rouge, a giant. I knew Vincent Lecavalier in high school and watched him play for the school team, but I'm confident to say Louis Leblanc shows more promise now than what he showed us then. Also can you not say this young scorer wasn't born to play in the Saint Flanelle?

They say hindsight is 20/20.

And I don't care who was picked after Andrei Kostitsyn. Who's to say those players would be the same they are today? And stop talking about Kopitar. Carey Price was the need and the right choice.

Statement: Mob mentality works in riots, also in newspapers!

TRUE!
All the "Fire Gainey! Fire Timmins! Fire the anthem singer!" are getting a bit rediculous. In a city that never allows a team to accept the high draft pick without pure luck (Carey Price) and where it's all some rediculous rhetoric of "Stanley Cup or Nothing!" which was pretty valid when there were 6 teams running about for the year, it's time to wake up and smell the parity of the new bollocks NHL. Yes, the one where hockey dead zones get all the naturally good players and where the hockey hot zones have to fight over the scraps they hope develop into good players. (See above). If it's not Sergei vs Coach Martin, it's the Halak vs Price, or Guimauve getting endless RDS praise while Andrei gets laughed at when he's checked into the boards. Anyone wonder why Sergei is banished to Hamiltonia while Gui gets the sleepy sleepy wakey wakey get your ass to the rink and play treatement? But what does Price have to do to get any respect from the twat Jack Todd? (And a couple of the Gazette writers actually, you know, the crabby ones). Snarky, even after 53 saves in a solo effort. You know, I'm cool with fans being all "the Mighty Halak, he's so abused by this team" 'cause they're fans, they're allowed to be marginally idiotic (or fully) regardless how annoying it is... But a guy in print in a local newspaper talking about the local team and constantly spews nothing but bile in their general direction? Yup, my dad knows him. He's an ass in person.

Yes, Jack Todd was wondering why Price was even playing in Phoenix, let alone Nashville. I could just stand on a building and say "Hey Todd, FUCK YOU~!" but that would disturb my good neighbors.

I don't read the French rags, but I know what they say. It's not much different, only laced with more Chez Nous.

Before you think about running the current stock of players, prospects, and staff out of town, think of the alternative. You could get Pierre McSplooge as a GM. (Vomit. Gag). Or Serge Savard will come in and trade Price for Owen Nolen and send Markov out like he did Chelios, because you know he'll never play for very long!

Statement: Injuries, to key players, can dent a season. Deal with it.

True!
Take away your number 1 defenceman, a promising young giant defenceman looking to rebound and was, remove the sparkplug hardworking journeyman for a few games, allow many others play with their injuries (hey it's up to them), and then finally lose your number 1 forward that stunts the line to merely Mexican Squid...sprinkle in a forward masquerading as a defenceman who causes more goals against than goals for, add bangers who won't bang and scorers who won't score... Yes, it will be tough. Yes, other teams have significant injuries. Yes this fucking marathon Olympic season is a recipe for disaster. All we can do is hope they work through it. Coach Martin, the ball is in your court.

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Batten down the hatches. The Whalercanes are in town, hot off their shootout win because Jussi Jokinen is the shootout king. But if you, my Habs, make Leighton look like the second coming of the Goalie God, then LET'S GO TAYLOR HALL. Manny Legace is no better! All I ask is I come home from a delicious sushi dinner (mmm...sushi pizza...I'll have 4 please) to a better effort than Nashville, OK?

Predictions, speculations, and other malarkey

Pardon me while I scrooge for a moment, but if there's one thing I hate about the playoffs it's the predictions and the media. Oh lordy I wished everyone would just shut up and enjoy the ride. I know the media is paid to do that kind of crap, but do they need to shove it down our throats every 24 hours? Does every snarky two-bit disc jockey out there have to chime in their two cents every waking moment? Do I need to wake up in the morning to arrogant comments about how the "Habs will whip the Bruins in 7" or how my company's video game simulator pegged the Bears to take the Cup in a final with the Sharks? (The very same simulator that had Kovalev signing with the Predators and had the Leafs as the number 1 team in the League). Does PJ Stock need to open his fucking mouth? Does Elliot Friedman have to talk with that annoying voice of his? Can Ted Bird STFU about goaltending? Can I get through this month without crosschecking Ric Peterson and Rick Moffat? Does it need to be like this?

Did you know every time Brian Wilde raises his eyebrows and stutters information jokingly while looking sideways towards his viewers, a kitten dies? Similarly when François Gagnon give his two cents about the Habs, puppies explode. Save the kittens and the puppies. Ban the TV. Burn the newspapers.

And no I don't have an alarm that isn't a radio. Well, I do, but the buzzer is heart attack city and I'd rather not wake up to that...

In a vain effort to preserve what enjoyment I can take from this most wonderful time of the season, I am attempting to glue my radio to the wall so I can pick up 99.9 the Buzz. This station is the rock alternative (and the only station I listen to except my shitty clock radio barely picks it up) and comes from Burlington, Vermont, so the only sports they ever talk about is baseball, football, or basketball, and even then it's only in passing on the "news".

It's either that, or I'm leaving the country.

Gluing the radio is cheaper though.

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In other news, we might not hear of the name "Tavares" until draft day. There is a god. Burke, however, unfortunately, wants to trade up so we might still hear the name that shall not be spoken. Lindros Trade anyone?

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And in more news, the Lightning fired a bunch of staff and so immediately the press idiots jumped back on the ZOMG VINNY'S GONNA BE TRADED van. I heard that causes global warming. They also fired their mascot. So long, top-heavy bug thing. Now who will torture unsuspecting beachgoers? Have you people no shame?!

The Bob and...oh fuck it: Habs 4, Sens 5

If the players out there look like they don't care anymore then I don't care anymore. Actually I never really took it seriously enough to really care too much about it, since in the end it's just a game that I watch. But it bothers me to see them play like this. What other team takes 30 minutes to warm up and leaves their end so defenseless or poorly defended that it's 3-1 by the end of the first period? They go around with no speed or urgency, they allow players to walk right in through the backdoor (might not want to allow Spezza or Heatley or Alfie that much space but I could swear you knew that already), they don't challenge anyone in the defensive zone, they're inconsistent, and they've been playing up and down like this since that crazy Captials game at the Bell Center (with the exception of the Pens game at the Bell Center, which was the last game I saw them play as a team). One goalie, one defenseman, and one trio DO NOT MAKE A TEAM PEOPLEZ. And god forbid if Price or Halak have a fuzzy night, 'cause apparently it's all over if they do. (Regardless of who has the flu now). What happened to the team that would win games when Halak let in 3/4/5 in his second takeover from an injured Price? I dunno if they noticed either but they're on the verge of toppling headfirst to like 10th place or something. Clouston says the Sens are a playoff team. I'm not sure if mathematically they can make it unless teams like our Habs keep playing like brainless zombies. Actually, zombies appear to have more urgency. They seem to be viciously and seriously attacking my brother right now in Resident Evil 5. But I digress. Oh and Benoit Brunet, when you know something about goaltending or defense or teams playing in cohesion, then you may open your mouth. Until then, please shut the fuck up.

Bob may want to stop cancelling the morning skate. These droogs apparently need it.

Also, anyone else noticed how depressed Price sounds in the press? For over a week now?

Carbo's press conference: First I'd like to say that François Gagnon, Jacques Demers, and a few others are taking the wrong approach in this matter in that they're delving way to personally on the issue. Though Gagnon seems content with trying to dig out the weed in the room and would love to pin the tail on the Kovy or Koivu. But you guys are doing the same thing as what happened with Ribero (an overrated player who was protected by the media and only realized the shit he was in when he didn't have that protection in Dallas). Next, I'm sorry Carbo but as one of your loyal supporters I have to tell it like it is. If he cannot understand why he was fired, then he cannot look past his nose. I gave him the benefit of the doubt that the players were just making wrong decisions and the coaches would fix these problems. But then the errors continued. The SAME errors every time. And it accumulated until Gainey himself saw his team running around absolutely lost and a coach unable to explain why. Of course we know Gainey took care of one issue (Kovy with a mysterious illness that's been bothering him and an inspirational chat), which brought me to the conclusion that Gainey was giving Carbo the chance to fix the others. That never happened. Finally Gainey terminated his venture and took over the team to try and fix these errors (however I feel it's far too late as their habits are so ingrained they're almost natural, except I noticed they don't ice the puck as much anymore). Where "ugly" victories were brushed off as victories and their problems ignored again, more bad habits formed from those. How many times did we see games lost because the bounces didn't go our way? Apparently the system was based on pure chance. This is where you failed and lost your job, Carbo. We saw inklings of this in the playoffs last season, but just brushed it aside as a young team with frazzled veterans. But the same problems of inactivity were still occuring. As a coach, simply changing the lines aren't a solution to a system problem. As a coach, it is the coaches responsibility to cover this. Lack of communication is a key to this problem. However, communicating with your players is not the same as communicating with the media. I know the door was opened but if the players themselves just think they won despite the errors then it's ok, this does not help things and they won't go seeking the coach on the issues. A good coach would be proactive in communication with his players to address the issues. And I don't know about these team meetings we constantly hear from because they seemed to have worked only once... Bowling and bag skating don't fix problems that players don't understand themselves, and as a coach and ex-player, that is a job like a mentor. It's not about "losing the room" or dealing with the different personalities, it's about the play. And in the end, I've come to the conclusion that I don't think he was a good coach. It's unfortunate, but I think Carbo should go and maybe coach the Q team he owns like Patrick Roy and gain experience through the ranks.

(On a side note) Roy, at least, despite being a goalie all his life, went out and learned every aspect of this game from defense to powerplays to get his team competitive. Carbo, however, relies solely on players who show the same heart he had as a player. While heart is important, the rest is missing. His only good trait though was being a shrewed tactician.

In other news:
I spent over an hour stuck in a dark Metro car as the power was out on the Orange Line while some lady was singing like a dead cat in a part of the station. I do believe that might have been the train to hell.

Oh and the Quebec budget is shit, the PQ is probably going to take power next time because lord knows they can do worse so of course the people will vote for them, couple that with maybe Ignatieff getting the job in Ottawa...and I'd like to move to another planet, please. Unless William Shatner really does run for Prime Minister.