Habs 5, Islanders 2: The pattern

This is what happens when you skate into Brad Boyes' ass.

This team's formula is probably first period (pile it on) -  second period (take a break) + third period (world beaters) = success! That or they're just bored and want to challenge themselves by fucking themselves over. I don't care where they are in the standings. If they can blow this game and only manage 2 powerplay goals on Poulin they deserve an F.

But hey, let's ignore all the bad stuff and praise that third period right?

Hey Islanders?
- Move already.
- So sick of radio hosts holding up Price's stats in Long Island. Did it ever occur to you just how SHIT the team plays there as a whole? He was great tonight and they could have easily lost the game anyway. Mostly because it's like there's no defence when they come here...
- Islanders repeatedly came screaming down the ice 3 guys wide and the Habs did nothing to counter it.
- I was waiting for them to pull out the Flying V.
- But hey, at least the penalty kill was spot on tonight.
- Or at least Price was on that second period kill...
- I will not survive an extra year of Frankie Bou backing up instead of closing the gap between himself and say John Tavares.
- Every time Matt Carkner takes a blatant penalty he turns around and bitches to the ref about it.
- PK Subban: Two goals bitches~! Now up to 9 with 22 points in 24 games. Maybe you should work on THAT contract instead of Frankie Bou...
- Yes Drew Doughty finally scored a goal.
- Hey Desharnais, it's amazing what happens once you extract your head from your arse eh?
- Gionta has somehow managed to quietly collect 10 goals on the year.
- If I could, I'd have a team of Ellers and Gallaghers.
- Good job putting the puck in your own net, Islanders. Gally thanks you.
- With 5 minutes left, the Islanders started diving up and down the ice. Of course the dive they called was a dumb one.
- Thumbs up to taking a penalty with 3 minutes left.

In the end, I don't know whether to applaud or line you all up and slap you.

Habs 4, Islanders 2: Dear God

Dear God,
This is Scott Gomez speaking. I know I make way too much money, but I give back most of it to various charities and my own hockey program back home for underprivileged children. I think the most I've used of it was for a new fishing rod. Anyway, the Archdiocese of Montreal has asked fans to pray that we make that lucrative 8th spot. I would seriously gladly give up every bit of scoring touch if that were to happen, but I realize the boys need some help with goals. I'm really not up to trying the Olli Jokinen Big Mac special... These guys have been through a lot this year. And most of the fans are really cool with you. So what do you say, God?

Thanks. You're awesome.

- Max Pacioretty is kind of tied with Ovechkin in goals and points. I am not shitting you.
- And a 00.0 hat trick!
- Oddly enough the first career hat trick for Patches is fighting for a headline...
- Carey Price got 20 wins behind this team finally. That deserves an award considering.
- Dude, like every angle RDS showed us was a high stick on that Moulson goal but I'm guessing considering the speed they went through the review, and the fact they didn't even want to review it, tells me the refs wanted out of that shitty building as soon as possible.
- Yea, they gave Streit the 2nd star of the game. OK there...considering the game was basically the Islanders vs Price and he doesn't even get recognized for that?
- Andrei Kostitsyn didn't believe Gomez scored. Gomez replied with a "LOLfuckyou".
- I have a costume to make for a party Saturday night. It's not going well...

You can take this down now.

Other than spending way too much time in their own zone and basically forgetting there's another end of the ice to play in, Habs should play like this more often. Of course praise be Price in nullifying almost everything possible.

If Pacioretty doesn't win the Masterton trophy this year, I will seriously lose whatever thinly veiled faith in the League I had left since you-know-what happened...

Habs 5, Islanders 3: Whether deserved or not...

...a win is a win. And Al Montoya helped save Jacques Martin's job once again.

Sigh.

People ask why this team can't hold a 2 goal lead. They wonder why the 3rd period always ends up being a lump sided affair in terms of shots on net for the other team. They wonder why a team that stresses defence can't seem to defend. The answer is simple: they're doing Jacques Martin's favourite Play Without the Puck. You have NO excuse for not getting more than 3 shots on Al Montoya by the time they scored their 3rd to tie it up. (Of course it was 2 goals on 3 shots so...there's that).

Regardless, I would have been extremely pissed if they blew this one. I am pissed they almost did. Yes the Islanders have done better on the road lately after absolutely sucking for most of the season. Yes Moulson had 4 fucking goals against Dallas (though it was Raycroft). They have to stop doing that watching crap with a 1-goal lead. However they did show us they can battle hard through their own problems and overcome an aggressive 3-man forecheck that was killing them every time.

Oh look, 2 games over .500, plan the fucking parade
- Kostitsyn's goal was a lovely piece of effort. All he does is work. He's strong and powerful and having Cole on this team seems to have inspired him to find that AK46 who scored end-to-end rushes while on a line with Pleky and Kovy a few years ago. He wants the puck every time he's out there even when the other team has the puck.
- All I want for Christmaskah is 5 more Erik Coles. His goal was a powerplay goal (shocking I know!) and his rage to win this game coupled by him nearly getting killed by the goal post ignited a fire I've only seen in Carey Price. He was so angry he even put the puck into the net that was already off it's moorings just to start shit.
- And on Cole's goal, Desharnais' passing is so slick and smooth. He pump-faked a shot that stuttered every Islanders player opening the space for Cole to slam it in.
- Apparently Price told Nokie he deserved a goal. And after completely botching PK's pass on Moulson's goal, he made up for it with an assist and the game winning goal. With Eller smartly protecting the puck along the boards, he casually made his way towards the blue line and spotted Nokie coming off the bench who absolutely launched that sucker so hard he scored in stereo. Now I'm just worried he'll be the new forward on the point.
- Hal Gill scored the empty netter. Hal Gill gives you wings.
- PS, fuck Matt Martin. Hate that jerk. Could have broken PK's leg on that shit.

Islanders had no quit in them, and you should hope so considering they're all kids (with the exception of a few). Habs have serious problems to fix (one being NO to Kaberle-Campoli pairing against a top line and another being Emelin should play ON HIS RIGHT SIDE you morons). But the powerplay looks so much better with Kaberle (RC Cola Markov) and a little bit of a will to win came into play. Major bummer though, after taking a therapy day yesterday, Moen left the game early... (Another reason why Emelin should be in the lineup, you know, for that physical edge on the penalty kill and such).

Oh, yea. Kaberle now has 3 assists in 2 games.

Pre-season: Kicking around some kids sure makes a town happy

We can't stop here! This is Nordiques country!

The pre-season is finally over.

And with a 7-2 romp of the Other Islanders (the true roster was somewhere beating up the Devils), it's time to head off into the cold October sunset and prepare for the long grind of the regular season. Naturally RDS spent most of it's time talking Blue so they missed Nino Niederreiter attempted blindside on Mike Cammalleri (you know, the one the NHL made a video of to try and curb headshots) which started this whole sequence of a pissed off Cammalleri going after the freshly minted draftee ending in Cammalleri going Bobby Clarke on his leg. (Apparently Nino was left with a bruise, oh boohoo).

As my brother said "nothing is worse than an angry rookie in a terribly lumpsided romp".

Of course later on a 3rd period faceoff, a Not-So-Islander went after Lars Eller from behind. Ryan White tried to clean up the mess, but it was Jaro Spacek who ended up getting jerseyed and clocked for playing Good Cop. Slap Shot was on the movie network before the game. Maybe the boys got inspired.

But that's OK 'cause TSN's headlines were already calling for a suspension on Cammalleri. And while Cammy could have done like Eller and take it to them on the scoreboard or with a big hit, his infraction is not suspendable. Then again the NHL works in mysterious ways. And he wears a Habs jersey.

So what can we say about the play tonight? (Other than it was 40 minutes too long)
- Tomas Plekanec has taken out all the tools of the crafty box. An amazing fakeout on Manny Legace by purposedly shooting the puck at the boards to get the rebound Brian Gionta style? You sneaky bastard, I love the new Plekanec!
- Alex Picard has shown us the Alex Picard we all know from his time with the Sens. In other words, the Alex Picard that drove SLC mad. (Sample quote: "Alex Picard has already cost me five stress balls, two remotes and one neighbour so far this season.") Fitting that he's got Brisebois' old number.
- Regardless of who the competition was, Price looks to be rounding into regular season form. There was a sequence where the puck was going goalie pong in our end. The Not-So-Islanders could have scored 5 goals right there but he stood his ground. And the team REALLY NEEDS TO LEARN HOW TO TAKE A PASS FROM HIM!
- Yea it was men against boys out there (for the most part) but our defense really needs to stop drooling.
- Thanks for practicing the powerplay and penalty kill too.
- Gorges on the powerplay blows my mind. I love him though.
- Nice to see the coaches finally seem to be sticking with a forward up high. It only took a year of everyone screaming at you to do this to finally get it done.
- Well, PK obviously stays. Legace needed ointment after that goal.
- Eller most likely will stay though I wouldn't mind it if Randy&Randy can take him for a few weeks. The Great Dane is big, hard to catch, and will draw penalties like nobody can. He also doesn't get rattled when gooned.
- I wish Pouliot could go on a conditioning stint. Sure it was probably his best pre-season game yet, he still looked lazy on a few plays.
- I want Ryan White to staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.
- The Colisée is a shitty building. Or as I call it, the "'Ostie Calissée". Still, fun to see NHL players in junior benches.

By the way, if you want the Nordiques back, don't come crying to the federal government for money. Especially when you send separatist politicians to ask.

Habs3, Islanders 0: Zombies don't like snow storms

Ho ho ho! The Markov 79 strikes again.

I can take the signal down! The call has been answered! Andrei Markov has returned! The heavens have opened and belched down a pile of snow for this Hallmark moment.

And what better way to stop the slide than a trip to New York to visit the slumping, disinterested zombie Islanders. They're just what the doctor ordered! But don't think you'll enjoy this type of game if Atlanta remains it's annoyingly cocky bastard self on Monday 'cause tonight was a battle of pure slop. I only hope this win gives them some confidence to stop playing like they're sleepwalking.

This is, of course, assuming they get out to Atlanta considering the storm...

HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY!

POWERPLAY!
- Three powerplay goals was all she wrote. Almost got a fourth but Biron decided to be good at the end of the game.
- The glorious return of Markov! Two of those powerplay goals, thank you very much. Only has 45 games to get back up there.
- Metro with the last powerplay goal. And Guimauve wonders why he lost his powerplay time to Metro? It's only his 4th goal of the year there.
- Fourty shots? I honestly don't remember that many...
- Tavares was where? Okposo was doing all the work tonight. Moulson lost interest after Jaro stopped him twice in close.
- Everytime Metro-Moen-Patches were sniffing for a goal, they drew a penalty instead. Which is good but they really wanted to score!
- Islanders players spent more time falling on their ass than playing.
- Pleky showing his fatigue. The penalty box was renamed the vacation box. Cranky night. My hamster Pleky was also cranky tonight. Hmm...
- The Mara/Rhino pairing on D will ragdoll you
- Sergei created some great chances and caused much havoc but Pierre Houde couldn't get Brunet to give the kid any credit or compliment. He just wanted to point out the bad stuff.... Like the nice set up he made for Gomez who was too late to convert.
- Streit was showing why Bob wasn't willing to give him that high priced contract.
- Laraque asking Sutton to dance for his hit on Pleky was lame. You think Sutton will go with Laraque? He's smarter than that. You have to either get in his face or hit him like a target all night.
- Like when Hunter went after Markov, Moen went after Hunter
- Our special teams rock, including a 4 minute penalty kill that spent more time in the other end.
- For a moment I thought Jaro was doing like Mike Smith and might have actually picked up a thing or two about puckhandling from Price...and then he went back to the normal Jaro. Almost screwed up his shutout bid too... Ah well, that's our Jaro!
- So they really do call penalties with 2 seconds left eh?
- Apparently they asked the crowd to move closer to the rink to fill up the empty seats. The Islanders fans had long left if they were there in the first place. It was a sea of red, white, and blue...and not the American flag.
- About time this team worked for a shutout!

OK Habs fans... I know the trip to Long Island is cool and all, but when you start singing the Goodbye song, in someone else's home, it just makes you a crowd of douchebags. Though heckling Biiiiiiiiron in his own building was hilarious.