Awake from your slumber!

Surprise announcement! Habs extend Max Pacioretty's contract a year early to SIX YEARS in the middle of the night in August. For dirt cheap too. That got the Blackberries scrambling eh?

Cue mandatory FUCK YOU CHARA. There, done.

Cue mandatory photo of Toaster, back from the vet and sporting his new Old Navy sweater (says "Little Rebel" on it).

Now back to...well what the fuck I'm not doing anything right now except yelling curse words at Gary Bettman and his pack of annoying idiot owners. Seriously dudes, if you guys lock out again you're fuckwits. Take that 8-million dollar salary and shove it up your ass. I can't live off random Canada-Russia Summit Series all year...